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[QUOTE=zidd;461796]
-------------------------------- Ho gaye hum ek pal me khaak-bos Aakpi nazroN ne kya bosa diya [ ! or ? ] ------------------------------------ Zidd sahab ke is sher se seekhne ka ek aur nukta milta hai .... yahaaN jumla "khaak-bos" ka istemaal kiya gaya hai, which means "one that is kissing the dust". aise aur bhi jumle haiN jahaaN "bos" ko lafz ke aakhir meiN (as suffix) rakh kar jumla bana hai. examples are "pa-bos" which means "one that is kissing the feet" ya "aasmaaN-bos" ya "one that is kissing the feet". Members se request haiN ki jo "bos" as suffix par aur roshni daal sakte haiN, wo apni raay se nawaazeiN. is sher meiN misra-e-oola meiN "bos" aur misra-e-saanee meiN "bosa" ka istemaal kar ke Zidd sahab ne waaqayee "fusoon-e-alfaaz" paida kiya hai :) |
[QUOTE=zarraa;461828]
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[QUOTE=zidd;461832]
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"nam ankhon par bose ka lams" ... simply outstanding !! Dheron daad aur bahaut si mubarakbaad is sher par aap ko N@zneen ji ! |
ek aur sher arz hai lafz "bose" par ...
is tarah yaad teri dil meiN hai mere pinhaaN narm aariz pe jo bose ka ho halka sa nishaaN - zarraa (pinhaaN = concealed, aariz = cheek) |
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bohat khoob....................................:) |
koi nahi jo bosa de!
maa! jab se gayi chhood ke.... :( |
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bahot hi khubsurat sher pesh kiya hai :) .. jazbaat ko baDii sundarta se baandhaa hai... Quote:
khubsurat sher pesh kiya hai.... daad..... waah... umda...... :) Quote:
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baarish me.n samose toh bante hi hai LOLzzz..... :p bahot hi khubsurat bayaanaat huii hai.. uss per daad... Quote:
Lagta hai subah subah baarish me.n biwi ne samose lene bhej diya wo bhii Sunday ko, aapko LOLzzzz.... :D :p Quote:
jawaab nahi, kya khubsurat tareh se aapne bose lafz ka istemaal kiya hai... jaanibse daad.... Quote:
chhupa rustom kaun hai? ;) :p kya sher banaayaa hai... behad khubsurat.... :) Quote:
bahot khub... |
hamaarii ek koshish :)
paa-bosii* hai milii jo unse (kissing feet) bosa-zanii* kuchh ab aur bhii toh ho (kissing) bosiida-fazaa* kii kya fikar hai (delicate/fragile moment) ki bosa-e-lab* bhii kabhii toh ho (kissing of lips) Adil 'Safeer' ----------------------------- |
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SUPERB WORD PLAY! http://www.sherv.net/cm/emoticons/ha...y-emoticon.gif |
aur ek.. :)
bos-o-kanaar* me.n uljhe yu.n, wo bhii shab-e-firaaq me.n namii na dekhii aa.nkho.n kii, subah thii unkii taak me.n *bos-o-kanaar = embrassing/kissing & hugging |
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Hahaha.. Aadil bhai.. Boht hi dilkashi se biyaan kiya hy maajra.. Boht maza aaya pha'd kar.. :D DuaaoN ke saath,, |
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wwwwwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!! ye sher hai ke ek kaarnaamaa !! maiN ne is lafz ka ta'arruf karne waalee post meiN arz kiya tha ki "ab lafz-e-bosa ke bose lete haiN" ..... aap ke is sher ne waisa hi kiya hai :):):) ye sher to bose ki encyclopedia jaisa hai :):):) but seriously, amazing word play Aadeil bhai !! aur khayaal bhi khoob !! saath hi aap ka ye bahaut barha contribution hai ki lafz "bosa" se nikle itne saare alfaaz ka ilm karaaya ahl-e-mehil ko karwa diya !!! waaaah !!! to Aadeil bhai, dher saaree daad aur khoob saara shukriya !!! |
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beautiful.....aadeil sahab :) |
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bose booNdoN ke barg-e-gul par nam yaad saawan meiN aa gaya koyee aap ki raay mil jaaye is par, in absolute terms aur pichhle version ke comparison mein, to mujhe kuchh seekhne ko milega. shukriya. |
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yahan main Danny Boss ka Shair arz karna chahooN ga:- jeene ke liye mujhe ek sapnaa dedo haqeekat meri jaaN liye jaa rahi hai DuaooN k saath,, |
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Bohat khoob. ................................. ....... |
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Zarra sahib..aapke dono ashsaar takriiban ek hi mijaaz Ke hai....jaisa ki aapne khud tasliim kiya hai.......shabnam - subah aur boo'nde- saawan Ka munaasibat qaayam karne ki koshish ki hai aapne.........khair ab baari- baari dono ashaar par ghaur karte hai. 1st sher Aapke pahle SHE'R me aap oola ko do tarah se le sakte hai.....waise main niji taur par doosra misra rakhne ki sifaarish karunga 1) Bose'n shabnam Ke phool Ke rukh par 2) bosa shabnan Ka gul Ke aariz par Aapke misre me'n aur in do misro me'n kyaa farq hai...mai'n nahi bataaunga,,,thodhi zehani kasrat kariye........aap samajh jaaye'nge.... Ab baat karte hai saani ki Aapne saani me'n sub'h-e-dam ...likha hai...subh'a aur dam Dono ism ( noun) hai ...jab do ism ko izaafat se joda jaata hai...to iske do usuul hai.. 1) dam -e -subah yaani ..in the time of morning 2) ya phir sub'h dam bhi likh sakte hai lekin ab izaafat maqloobi ( disappear) ho jaayegi.....izaafat e maqloobi ki bahut Achchi missal hai ...jahaa'npanaah.......yaani In the panaah of jahaa'n aap yu'n samajh le ki aap sub'h-e-dam ..na le balqi ....sub'h dam likh le Aapke SHE'R me'n ye ek aib thaa so zikr kar diya... 2nd sher Aur ab doosre sher ki baat karte hai.... Oola me > be< ki takaraar baarhaa ho rahii hai jisse tajnis Ka lutf paida ho raha hai..lekin misre Ke aakhir me'n > nam< saraasar bharti lag raha hai...is simt thoda tawajjo De... Sher aap yu'n kah sakte hai Bose par Bose gul pe De boo'nde Yaad saawan me'n aa gayaa koi. Bose par Bose ...istemaal karna bahut khaas hai kyu'nki saawan me'n jab baarish hoti hai to boo'nde boso'n ki bauchhar lagaa deti hai........ Koi shubah rah gaya ho to bejhijhak took De.... |
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Aap ki saaree bataein mujhe ekdum sahi lag rahi hain aur kisi baat par koyee shubah naheen. Mujhe sochne ka bahaut saamaan mila hai, jo na sirf is sher ko mukammal karne mein balki aage bhi kaam aayega. Bas 1-2 choti si baatein clarify karna chaahoonga ... mera iraada "sub'he dam" mein "subh-e-dam" kehne ka naheen tha jo ki galat hai jaisa ki aap ne bhi farmaaya, balki lafz "subh" ke "h" ko "he" ka accent dene ka tha. maqsad wazan clear karne ka tha, by demarking "sub" as one unit with wazan of 2 and "he" as a separate unit as wazan of 1. "he" ki jagah "ha" ka bhi accent de sakta tha par maine "he" ko use kiya for no particular reason, just liked it more than "ha" I guess :) par aap ki baat samajh kar mujhe lag raha hai ki "ha" hi use karne chaahiye kyunki "he" se ye lagna natural hai "subh-e-dam" kaha ja raha hai. ek ye bhi arz karna chaahoonga ki lafz "nam" ko "bose" ki "quality" ko describe karne ke ki koshish mein istemaal kiya tha. mujhe laga ki "nam bose" ki analogy zyada appropriate lag rahegi baarish ke context mein "normal bose" ke muqaable :) is se boondon ke phool par lams ko bose ka darja dena zyada justified lagega, aur analogy ka lutf paida hoga. magar aap ki is baat se main 100% ittefaaq rakhta hoon ki misre ke aakhir mein aane se "nam" ka lafz zabaradasti daala hua lag raha hai. in current form, na maanee khul raha hai na lutf paida ho raha hai, balki confusion hi create ho raha hai. waise aap ka "bose par bose" ka khayaal kamaal ka laga. daad aap ko us par ! to ek baat phir aap ka dher saara shukriya Ufaq sahab ! thanks for all the help :) ! Duaon ke saath Zarraa |
doston ... lafz "bosa" par guftagoo aaj raat midnight tak chalegi, kal se naya lafz.
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lafz "bosa" par members ke kahe huwe apne qalaam .....
bosa shabnam ka phool ke rukh par sub'he dam yaad aa gaya koyee -zarraa HaseeN hai yeh manzar haseeN hai nazaara Ufaq per zameeN aasmaaN ka yeH bosa -zainy tere fusoon-e-bosa ki kya tareef karun 'ananthpak' ke ek bosa ne umr bhar ka itminaan de diya -praneeta muntazir hun iltija par meri kab tu dil-o-jaan se razi hogi k tera ik bosa hi iss aashiq par zara-nawazi hogi -ananthpak Lagta garma garm hi acchha Ab ho bosa ya ho samosa -zidd SaikhDo laana.te hai bose par Apni to kat gayi samose par -zidd Ho gaye hum ek pal me khaak-bos Aakpi nazroN ne kya bosa diya [ ! or ? ] -zidd Ik khwaab ka tawaaf tha darparda kwaab ke Kya le liya tha bosa hi but ke naqaab ka ? -zidd bivi ki ye zidd thii ke milegaa tabhii BOSAA, baahar ka khilaao mujhe DOSA ya SAMOSAA -shaad Bose Ke waqt dono ki palke'n jhuki rahii, Tark-e-hayaa huyi to thii lekin hayaa Ke saath -ufaq baarish meiN n baahar ke hai khaane ka bharosa phir dosa samosa naheeN chooran ka hi bosa -zarraa Nam ankhon par wo tere bose ka lams Khudaya aaj bhi roney se roktiin hain -n@zneen is tarah yaad teri dil meiN hai mere pinhaaN narm aariz pe jo bose ka ho halka sa nishaaN -zarraa koi nahi jo bosa de! maa! jab se gayi chhood ke -hassan paa-bosii hai milii jo unse bosa-zanii kuchh ab aur bhii toh ho bosiida-fazaa kii kya fikar hai ki bosa-e-lab bhii kabhii toh ho -aadeil bos-o-kanaar me.n uljhe yu.n, wo bhii shab-e-firaaq me.n namii na dekhii aa.nkho.n kii, subah thii unkii taak me.n -aadeil |
Naya lafz
dostoN ... is baar ka lafz hai .... KHALWAT .....
"khalwat" means solitude / privacy / the state of being alone .... akele meiN hone ki haalat lafz "khalwat" meiN "T" ka pronunciation is as in TiTlee (butterfly), Tees (30), raaT (night) ... aap samajh gaye hoNge. to is baar hum lafz "khalwat" par ghaur kareNge, koyee sher, qit'ta, nazm, rubaayee ya aur kuchh jise shayari kaha ja sake, keh kar. aap "khalwateiN", "khalwatoN" wagairah ka bhi qalaam meiN istemaal kar sakte haiN. shayari ke saath saath SDC style guftagoo bhi jaaree rakhiyega. maqsad sirf ek doosre se kuchh seekhne ka hoga. members se darkhwaast hai ki is lafz par apne khayaalaat aur ilm bhi baaNtte raheiN aur is ki nuances par roshni daaleiN, jis se hum sab saath saath seekh sakeiN. "khalwat" ki taqti, mere opinion meiN, hai 22. any other opinion is welcome. "khalwat"par ghaur karne ka silsila hum chalaaenge agle 4 din tak, yaani 19th July midnight India time ya 6:30 PM GMT. ab lafz "khalwat" par kuchh ustaad shora ke aashaar ka lutf uthaate haiN ... mere hone meiN hai kya ruswaayee ai wo majlis naheeN khalwat hi sahi -ghalib agar khalwat meiN tu ne sar uthaaya bhi to kya haasil bhari mehfil meiN aa kar sar jhuka leti to achchha tha -majaaz abhi zinda hooN lekin sochta rehta hooN khalwat meiN ki ab tak kis tamanna ke sahaare ji liya maiN ne -saahir kuchh mohtasiboN ki khalwat meiN kuchh waaiz ke ghar jaatee hai hum baada-kashoN ke hisse ki ab jaam meiN kam-tar jaatee hai -faiz kaheeN khalwateiN dukaaneiN kaheeN jism beeyopaaree n kisi sanam ko shikwa n dukhee koyee pujaaree -faraaz ki nazm se khudi ki khalwatoN meiN gum raha maiN Khuda ke saamne goya n tha maiN -iqbaal to chaliye, shuru ho jaate haiN ! is lafz-e-khalwat ki khalwat meiN khalal daalte haiN aur ise le kar aate haiN apne aashaar ki anjuman meiN ... :):) duaoN ke saath zarraa |
khalwat meiN kiye jurm ki saza!
aaj nahi to kal zaroor milay gii.. tanhai mein huay hamaray gunaahoN ki saza is jahan meiN nahi to us jahaN zaroor mile gii.. |
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achchhi aur sachchii baat kahi hai... :) bahot khub... |
ek koshish...... :)
Khalvat-o-jalvat* kii apnii surate.n -----[privacy/loneliness & company] gham me.n ek pyaara to duuja shaadii* me.n -----[happiness] |
Naaz.. this is for you:-
hai yaQeeN k khatam hooN gay ayaam-e-khalwat.. phir hum bhi khoob lootieN gay maza-e-ulfat... :) |
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boht khoob Aadil saheb.. :) |
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ek adnaa si koshish.. Khalvat-nashii.n* hoo.n haath me.n khaalii hai baadiyaa* hai intezaar ki aake pilaaye labo.n se wo khalvat-nashii.n = sitting in isolation/seclusion ; baadiyaa = goblet |
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