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Parastaar 2nd March 2004 12:55 PM

Kuucha-e-kalam...
 
KUUCHA-E-KALAM...

Shayri ki duniya ke muazeez mehmaanoN?khushaamdeed! Hum kuch yaraane sukhan milke, ek baar phir iss bazm mein aap ka istakbaal karte hai.

Doston hamari pichli koshisoN ke ajar ko madde nazar rakhte hue, hamein intehayee khusi ke sath yeh kehne mein faqr mehsoos hota hai ke..is bazm mein shirkat karne waala har shakhs.. bawajood dooriyon ke jab yahan kisi kone ya kuuche mein milta hai.. tau yaa to apna dukh yaa apnii choti si khushi ko baaNTne ke iraade se milta hai...aur jab lauTta hai to apne dil-o-dimaag mein ek suroor sa liye jaata hai ke jispe keh sakte hain...

"Ghum apne baanT ke phir aaya hoon dostoN ko,
kabhi khushi mili to zaayqaa badal doonga."


Issii jazbe ki badulat hum ek ke baad doosri aur uske baad phir ek koshish karte raheinge..Doston iss baar aap ki pesh-e-khidmat hai ek aur kona jise naam diya gaya hai "Kuucha-e-Kalam".

Iss baar bhi humne kuch kaayde daryaaft kiye hain...aap se das-bastaa guzaarish hai ke inn qaaydon ke daayre mein reh kar hi aap ko shareeq hona hai...

1) Ibteda kuch be-misaal shayar, jo hamare beech maujood hain unke kalaam se hogi...jo apne rekhte ke andaaz aur shakshiyat ki wajah se hamare pasandeeda hain, aur aapke bhi..

2) Baad Unke kalaam ke silsila aage badhe ga lekin aap ko "Radeef" aur "Kafiya" wohi rakhna hai jo aapse aage likhne wale shaayr ne istemaal kiya thaa...

3) Aap ko sirf aur sirf ek sher likhna hai...zahir hai ke ibteda karne wala "Matla" likhega.. aur uske baad shaamil hone waale saare "Sher" honge.

4)?tradition aur ustaad hazraat ke hisaab se aik Ghazal meiN 5 se le kar 27 she'r kahe jaane ki ijaazat di gayi hai chunaaNche ..? (?Maikash) hum yahan 8 sher hee keh kar ghazal mukammal kareinge! phir the last person posting the fifth sher has to start another ghazal?matlab phir se ek "Matla" jiss mein "Radeef" aur "Kafiya" alag hoga.

5) Iss kuuche mein hum aapke andar ke shayar ko hath thaam ke sabke saamne laana chate hain...tau kuch aisee koshish kijiye ke woh ek behetreen sher ho..aap apne takhayyull (thoughts) ko jitna gehra ya phir jitna buland le jaa sakeN le jaayeiN.

6) Aap ko aap se pehle kahe gaye sher ko apna sher kehne se pehle doharaana zaroori hai?taaki ki ghazal kee continuity ka ehsaas ho?We are getting extremely quality conscious this time Doston...

Aap sabhi se poori shiddat se shirkat farmaane ki ummiid ke sath...KUUCHA-E-KALAM... mein apna zor-e-kalam aazmaane ki daawat dete hain, ummiid hai ke yeh koshish hamaari pichhli koshish se bhi behtar sila degi....Alvida?


Ik aakhrii baat dostoN, hum ek ke baad ek sher nahiiN pesh kar sakte; kisii aur ko kuch kehne kaa maukaa denaa paDe gaa pehle.
Only one sher at a time; if you wish to post more than one, then you'd have to wait until somebody goes before you.


------------
Ta- Gaur Tumhara

Talib

Parastaar 2nd March 2004 12:57 PM

Doston maine hamesha Mauseeqi ki mehfilein organize karne mein madad kee hai…aaj is “Kuucha-e-Kalam” ko aapke saamne rakhte huye bahut faqr mehsoos kar rahi hoon…jahan Mauseeqi se senses ko sukoon milta hai…wahan shayri, main samajhti hoon ki rooh ko seenchati hai…

Parastaar

Tau lijiey is mehfil ka aaghaaz karte hain Sharaabi Sahib ke likhe gaye iss sher se…

Dekho yaaroN dekho, sajaavaT mehfil kii
Har ghaDii rahe gii yeh chaahat mehfil kii


Sharaabi

Parastaar 2nd March 2004 01:16 PM

do jaam pee kar jab ladkhadayenge kadam
benaqaab ho jayegi sharafat mehfil ki

shamma ki jageh dil bhi jale hai yahan
dekh sako to dekho banawat mehfil ki


-Manoj


------------
Ek timtimata sitara...


Oh God! It seems main sabhi ke liye yahan post karne mein lagi hoon...Sharaabi Sahib...it is on your grounds now...pls take over and mujhe tau ijazzat dijiey...Phew!

ghayalparwana 2nd March 2004 04:09 PM

PARAS...Is mehfil ka humpar ehsaan hai jo isne hame yahan apne alfaaz bayan karne ki ijjazat di..issi baat par ye sheyr keh raha huun..

shamma ki jageh dil bhi jale hai yahan
dekh sako to dekho banawat mehfil ki

Is bazm main hai shareek hazaron Shayar..
ye rind bhi hai shamil, hai inayat mehfil ki..

salman shaikh 2nd March 2004 04:23 PM

Adaab Kabool Kijiye...
 
Salam Muhtrhaam Paraastar sahab...Chalien Janab AJ behti Ganga main Hum bhi harh dholien......

Is bazm main hai shareek hazaron Shayar..
ye rind bhi hai shamil, hai inayat mehfil ki..


Sadiuyn ka safar te karke tu yahan phoncha...
Aisii bhi kia thi tujhe.....mohabbat mehfil ki....


Shukriya....


EK ANJAAN SA SHAKS...
SALMAN SHAIKH...

manoj kureel 2nd March 2004 04:55 PM

Re: Adaab Kabool Kijiye...
 
aadab doston
shayri ke is kaarwaan mein ham bhi shaamil ho kar ek sher kehna chahenge......

Sadiuyn ka safar te karke tu yahan phoncha...
Aisii bhi kia thi tujhe.....mohabbat mehfil ki....

jawan nazaaron ka khumar dil par chada hai
ban ke kayamat aayi hai yeh raat mehfil ki

-Manoj

Sharaabi 2nd March 2004 05:08 PM

shuuruu shuuruu meiN kuch galtiiyaaN huii, par koii baat nahiiN, aisaa aksar hotaa rahe gaa. manoj saahab ne ik sher kii jagah do sher pesh kiye, aur salman bhai ghazal kaa khatmaa karnaa bhool gaye :p
koii baat nahiiN dostoN, ab shyad thoDa behtar samajh aa gayaa hogaa.

aur haaN, maine takhallus kaa isthemaal nahiiN kiyaa, kyooN kii ghazal mehfil ke naam thii.

here is the complete ghazal --
  • Dekho yaaroN dekho, sajaavaT mehfil kii
    Har ghaDii rahe gii yeh chaahat mehfil kii

    aman

    do jaam pee kar jab ladkhadayenge kadam
    benaqaab ho jayegi sharafat mehfil ki

    manoj saahab

    shamma ki jageh dil bhi jale hai yahan
    dekh sako to dekho banawat mehfil ki

    manoj saahab

    Is bazm main hai shareek hazaron Shayar..
    ye rind bhi hai shamil, hai inayat mehfil ki..

    varinder saahab

    Sadiuyn ka safar te karke 'hum' yahaaN paunche
    Aisii bhi kia thi humme.....mohabbat mehfil ki

    salman shaikh saahab

maafii chahtaa hooN salman saahab, aapke aakhrii sher ko thoDa edit kar diyaa, kyooN kii ghazal kii lambaaii paanch she'roN se zyaadaa nahiiN ho saktii. khair, gar buuraa laggaa ho, to chhoThaa bhai samajh kar maaf kar dii jiye gaa. aur manoj bhai kaa 'latest' pesh kiyaa huaa sher ghazal meiN shaamil nahiiN ho sakaa, kyooN kii lambaaii bahot bhaD gayii hai. maaf kar dii jiye gaa, par unke sher pe nazar zaroor daaliiye gaa:

jawan nazaaron ka khumar dil par chada hai
ban ke kayamat aayi hai yeh raat mehfil ki


ek baat aur dostoN -- aap is 'thread' jab bhii apnaa sher likho ge, to meherbaanii kar ke sabko bataa dii jiye gaa kii kaunse 'number' kaa thaa. only reson for that is so the writer compsing the last sher (Makta) knows that it is time to end the ghazal.

and finally, the lecture comes to an end with the last rule! as much as we all want to comment the compositions of others, please try to keep it low, as it gets confusing for the writer(s).

aur haaN, aglii ghazal kii shuruuvaat maiN nahiiN kar rahaa, jiskaa bhi dil ko, wahii karde. but remember, the first sher of the ghazal consists of two radeef(s).

goodnight

musharrafhusain 2nd March 2004 07:02 PM

Doston apni behan paras ki hidayet ke mutabiq haazir hoon.
mehfil mein apni aamid ka aaghaaz is shayr se kerta hoon

"AJNABI SAYA BANA AUR PHIR JUDA BHI HO GAYA
EK ZARA SI BAAT PER ITNA KHAFA BHI HO GAYA"

musharrafhusain

ghayalparwana 2nd March 2004 07:30 PM

GHAZAL KA DOOSRA SHEYR KEH RAHA HUUN..

Ajnabi saaya bana aur phir juda bhi ho gaya
Ek zara si baat per itna khafa bhi ho gaya

Unki aankhen hai dekhi jabse mehkhaana choot gaya
Dil ko sakoon bhi mil gaya alam e nasha bhi ho gaya

Parastaar 2nd March 2004 08:51 PM

main ghazal ka teesra sher keh rahi hoon....

Unki aankhen hai dekhi jabse mehkhaana choot gaya
Dil ko sakoon bhi mil gaya alam e nasha bhi ho gaya

Nazar bhar dekha bhi nahin ke dil diwaana ho gaya
Main hosh bhula baithaa, jannat-e-nazzaraa bhi ho gaya

talib 2nd March 2004 08:57 PM

Ta Umr aap ki marzi se jeeya to "talib" raha Accha,
mara khushi se to pesh-e-dafn bura bhi ho gaya.

pesh-e-dafn=dafn se pehle/before burial

Sharaabi 3rd March 2004 01:34 AM

pesh hai aap sabkii likhii ik ghazal; mubaarak-baad aur daad dono qubuul kii jiiye gaa!

  • AJNABI SAYA BANA AUR PHIR JUDA BHI HO GAYA
    EK ZARA SI BAAT PER ITNA KHAFA BHI HO GAYA

    musharraf saahab

    Unki aankhen hai dekhi jabse mehkhaana chuuTh gaya
    Dil ko sakoon bhi mil gaya alam e nasha bhi ho gaya

    varinder saahab

    Nazar bhar dekha bhi nahin ke dil diwaana ho gaya
    Main hosh bhula baithaa, jannat-e-nazzaraa bhi ho gaya

    paras jii

    Ta Umr aap ki marzi se jeeya to "talib" raha Accha,
    mara khushi se to pesh-e-dafn bura bhi ho gaya.

    talib saahab

    khafaa huaa, juda huaa, nashaa huaa, par buuraa huaa
    'aman' ke paauNchte jo kabristaan tanhaa bhii ho gayaa

    aman


There has been a slight change of rules; now the ghazal is required to have 8 sher(s). Ab paaNch kii jagaH, aahT sher'oN ke binna kaam nahiiN chale gaa, taakiiN aur logoN ko bhii maukaa mile. aur haaN, agar aap ek se zyaada sher likhnaa chahte haiN, to aapko intezaar karnaa paDe gaa. you can only post one 'sher' at once, but you can post another after somebody also gets a chance of posting.


Here's the start of a new ghazal, but remember this one is required to have 8 sher(s).

  • kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
    ..rote rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar!

Parastaar 3rd March 2004 02:49 AM

Ghazal ka doosra sher....

kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
rotaa rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar

kya khata meri, jo sabko apna samajh liya
har ik apne ne kiya asiirana-e-zanjiir um’r bhar

talib 3rd March 2004 01:20 PM

Gazal ka Teesra Sher

kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
rotaa rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar

kya khata meri, jo sabko apna samajh liya
har ik apne ne kiya asiirana-e-zanjiir um?r bhar

rakhta hai Khuda unpe bas nazr-e-dilaasa.
kehte hain khataoN ko jo takdeer umr bhar.

ghayalparwana 3rd March 2004 06:11 PM

Ghazal ka Chautha sheyr..

Kabeer ke ik dohe ko lekar likha hai..jo kuchh aisa hai-

MAATI KAHE KUMBHAR KO
TU KYA ROONDHE MOHE
IK DIN AISA AAYEGA
MAI ROONDHOGI TOHE.

Ghazal kuchh aisi chal rahi hai-

kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
rotaa rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar

kya khata meri, jo sabko apna samajh liya
har ik apne ne kiya asiirana-e-zanjiir um’r bhar

rakhta hai khud unpe bas nazr-e-dilaasa.
kehte hain khataoN ko jo takdeer umr bhar

Yaad rakh us Kumbhar ko jaan Maati ka Mol
Sun,Samajh,Apna jo kehta raha kabeer umr bhar

banjara'''' 4th March 2004 12:05 AM

hi
 
parastaar sahiba...
how r u?
kiya khob mehfil jmayi hay,,,,
daad,,,,or duain...
sharabi sahab ki shayri ka jwab anhi...
ghayal ji bhi kuch kam nahi...or talib sahib k to ham pahle se
qayal hain...or aap ka andaz bhi kmaal....
manoj sahab bhi lafzon se khob rang jma rahe hain
or mushi yaar....tumhare sher ne to yakin mano dil hi lut liya...
IK ZARA SI DER ITNA KHAFA BHI HO GYA...
kiya bat hay yaar...
bohat khob...

sab ko banjare ka slaam..or daad k sath duain..
go on guys...

.........''''
....''''

khan 4th March 2004 12:34 PM

chahta hoon ki bana lonn tujhko apni taqdeer umr bhar
hoti rahe mere khaabon ki taabeer umr bhar

Sahil

talib 4th March 2004 02:45 PM

ChaTha Sher (6th)

kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
rotaa rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar

kya khata meri, jo sabko apna samajh liya
har ik apne ne kiya asiirana-e-zanjiir um’r bhar

rakhta hai khud unpe bas nazr-e-dilaasa.
kehte hain khataoN ko jo takdeer umr bhar

Yaad rakh us Kumbhar ko jaan Maati ka Mol
Sun,Samajh,Apna jo kehta raha kabeer umr bhar

chahta hoon ki bana lonn tujhko apni taqdeer umr bhar
hoti rahe mere khaabon ki taabeer umr bhar

Kuch aise bhi guzre hain bazaar se Bande
Jo the to *tawangar rahe fakeer umr bhar.

*tawangar=wealthy/rich

ghayalparwana 4th March 2004 04:28 PM

Saatwa (7th) sheyr..

kartaa gayaa dhoke yeh zamiir um'r bhar
rote rahe pakaD ke tasviir um'r bhar

kya khata meri, jo sabko apna samajh liya
har ik apne ne kiya asiirana-e-zanjiir um’r bhar

rakhta hai khud unpe bas nazr-e-dilaasa.
kehte hain khataoN ko jo takdeer umr bhar

Yaad rakh us Kumbhar ko jaan Maati ka Mol
Sun,Samajh,Apna jo kehta raha kabeer umr bhar

chahta hoon ki bana lonn tujhko apni taqdeer umr bhar
hoti rahe mere khaabon ki taabeer umr bhar

Kuch aise bhi guzre hain bazaar se Bande
Jo the to tawangar rahe fakeer umr bhar.

Talasha tera saath bahut magar musalsal sikast hi mili
Dhoond na paaya hathon mein woh laqeer um'r bhar

Dard-e-sush 5th March 2004 04:50 AM

BAHUT Acha to nahin likh paunga aap sab mashoor or behtareen shayrano ki tarha magar 2 lines jod deta hun sochta hun :------

chahta hoon ki bana lonn tujhko apni taqdeer umr bhar
hoti rahe mere khaabon ki taabeer umr bhar

Kuch aise bhi guzre hain bazaar se Bande
Jo the to tawangar rahe fakeer umr bhar.

Talasha tera saath bahut magar musalsal sikast hi mili
Dhoond na paaya hathon mein woh laqeer um'r bhar

"""""
mana ta-umr hamne khud ko aajmaya hei
na tod paunga us pyaar ki janzeer umr bhar
"""""

REGARDS

Parastaar 5th March 2004 01:40 PM

Dard-e-Sush Sahib ke sher se iss ghazal ke 8 sher poore huye...tau aaj ek nayi ghazal shuroo karein?

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon mareiN hum?!
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darein hum..

Qasid 5th March 2004 08:38 PM

(had to edit to replace the first sher; sorry)
 
Pehle to bahut bahut maaufi sabse ki bahut der se yaha pahuncha hoon....mein kuch dino ke liye aap sabse dur tha iska bahut afsoos ho raha hai par khushi is baat ki hai ki aapne yeh milkar jo bazm shuru ki hai isme bahut mazaa aa raha hai...

Aman ji , paras ji bahut bahut shukriya itne nayaab ideas lekar aane ke liye... aapke likhe ke aage dusra sher likhne ki gusthaak koshish hai meri...

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum?!
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum

mast

Chaand 6th March 2004 11:57 AM

Doston ek koshish ki hai ise zaari rakhne ki (3rd) sher ke roop mai.

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum?!
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..
(parastaar)

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum
(mast)

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,

Afshan 6th March 2004 12:43 PM

Adaab Doston :)

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum?!
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..
(parastaar)

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum
(mast)

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,
(Chand)


4th Sher..

Ta umr rahi khushi ki justuju hume magar,
Har pal ashq o dard ka dum bharein ham.

(ME :D)

Parastaar 7th March 2004 12:41 PM

Ghazal ka panchwan (5th) sher

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,

Ta umr rahi khushi ki justuju hume magar,
Har pal ashq o dard ka dum bharein ham.

Cheen lein hansi, apne haq kee *sar-e-dast
Is *azm-e-baghaawat se bhala kyon darein hum


immediately
resolve

Qasid 8th March 2004 09:42 PM

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..
(parastaar)

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum
(mast)

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,
(Chaand)

Ta umr rahi khushi ki justuju hume magar,
Har pal ashq o dard ka dum bharein ham.
(Banno)

Cheen lein hansi, apne haq kee *sar-e-dast
Is *azm-e-baghaawat se bhala kyon darein hum
(parastaar)

az sar e nau phir huyi bad suluuki
Behaayi ke silaa kyon bhala aab darein hum

**az sar e nau = all over again

-mast

Afshan 9th March 2004 12:26 PM

GHazal ka 7th Sher

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..
(parastaar)

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum
(mast)

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,
(Chaand)

Ta umr rahi khushi ki justuju hume magar,
Har pal ashq o dard ka dum bharein ham.
(Banno)

Cheen lein hansi, apne haq kee *sar-e-dast
Is *azm-e-baghaawat se bhala kyon darein hum
(parastaar)

az sar e nau phir huyi bad suluuki
Behaayi ke silaa kyon bhala aab darein hum
(mast)

Ji kar marein hain, mar kar jeeye hain aashiq,
Kismat se phir kyu na laRein hum?

mastram 9th March 2004 05:47 PM

Ji kar marein hain, mar kar jeeye hain aashiq,
Kismat se phir kyu na laRein hum?


bewkoof hai wo aashiq jo aahein jo bharte hai
maikhane mein ja kar kyun na daaru peeyein ham?????

mastram
:D :D :D

Parastaar 13th March 2004 11:55 AM

jeete rahe mar mar ke, aaj kyoon marreiN hum
sirf ek lamhaa jee lene se, bataao kyon darreiN hum..
(parastaar)

saans aati jaati hai, keh lete hai hum jee liye
dhadkane waqfah aur bewaafa kya kareiN hum
(mast)

Haalaat na badle haiN, na badleNgeiNge shog se
Phir kyuN bhala har baat ka afsos kareiN ham,
(Chaand)

Ta umr rahi khushi ki justuju hume magar,
Har pal ashq o dard ka dum bharein ham.
(Banno)

Cheen lein hansi, apne haq kee *sar-e-dast
Is *azm-e-baghaawat se bhala kyon darein hum
(parastaar)

az sar e nau phir huyi bad suluuki
Behaayi ke silaa kyon bhala aab darein hum
(mast)

Ji kar marein hain, mar kar jeeye hain aashiq,
Kismat se phir kyu na laRein hum?
(Banno)

Maut tau aani hai, aa jayeigi ik din
phir aashiqii kee hud se, kyon na guzrein hum
(Parastaar)

Sharaabi Sahib kee gair haziri mein main yeh ghazal mukkammal karti hoon...wo jab bhi aayeinge humein galtiyon se wakif kara deinge...tau ek nayi ghazal ka aaghaaz karein?

Parastaar 13th March 2004 12:05 PM

Ghazal ka aaghaaz karte hain khan Banjara Sahib ke likhe gaye ek behetreen sher se...jo unhone iss mehfil ke liye hee likha thaa...Khan Bhayyia lijiey aapki taraf se pesh kar rahi hoon...

ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

------------
khan banjara''''
<mohabbat ka maza to judai main>

Afshan 13th March 2004 12:28 PM

Wow!.. Khan bhai ke sher se ab ghazal shuru ki hai, aisi 'level' ka likhna zara mushkil hoga..:confused: .. but I'll try..


2nd Sher..

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

talib 13th March 2004 03:10 PM

3rd Sher...


Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

Darj=register/entry(ies),
Darj-e-muradaN= Entires of desire.

Parastaar 14th March 2004 12:48 PM

Chautha(4th) sher...

ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

-Banjara

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

-Banno

Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

-Talib

Haaye wo samjhein hain na samjheinge, haal-e-bekasi kabhi
Be-ikhtyaari hamare sitam ki, chot khud bhi khayein ab sunaayein kitni

Aap ko aap se pehle kahe gaye sher ko apna sher kehne se pehle doharaana zaroori hai? taaki ki ghazal kee continuity ka ehsaas ho? Plz follow this guideline, and do tell which number-- as well...

Qasid 14th March 2004 07:30 PM

Bahut Khoob Doston...Aap sab ke aandar ke shayar ko padhkar bahut aacha lag raha hai....is silsile ko yun hi jaari rakhiyega..Ghazal ka 5th sher haazir hai


ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

-Banjara

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

-Banno

Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

-Talib

Haaye wo samjhein hain na samjheinge, haal-e-bekasi kabhi
Be-ikhtyaari hamare sitam ki, chot khud bhi khayein ab sunaayein kitni

-Parastaar

Sau Khataaon ka silaa, ek sitaam aabhi hai baaki
ek jafa bewaafi ki, aGHlaat aur ginaayein kitni

Afshan 15th March 2004 12:26 PM

Ghazal ka 6th Sher..

ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

-Banjara

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

-Banno

Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

-Talib

Haaye wo samjhein hain na samjheinge, haal-e-bekasi kabhi
Be-ikhtyaari hamare sitam ki, chot khud bhi khayein ab sunaayein kitni

-Parastaar

Sau Khataaon ka silaa, ek sitaam aabhi hai baaki
ek jafa bewaafi ki, aGHlaat aur ginaayein kitni

-Mast

Patthar ko dhaRka kar dil bana de, phir dil ko banaaye sheesha bhi,
TooTe to ilzaam kismat ke naam, Ajab mohabbat ki adaaein kitni.

khan 15th March 2004 02:08 PM

Ghazal ka 7th Sher

ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

-Banjara

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

-Banno

Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

-Talib

Haaye wo samjhein hain na samjheinge, haal-e-bekasi kabhi
Be-ikhtyaari hamare sitam ki, chot khud bhi khayein ab sunaayein kitni

-Parastaar

Sau Khataaon ka silaa, ek sitaam aabhi hai baaki
ek jafa bewaafi ki, aGHlaat aur ginaayein kitni

-Mast

Patthar ko dhaRka kar dil bana de, phir dil ko banaaye sheesha bhi,
TooTe to ilzaam kismat ke naam, Ajab mohabbat ki adaaein kitni

Chandni mein dhala hua ek naazuk sa badan
Kis kis se bache peechhe hain nigaahen kitni

Sahil


regards
Sahil Khan

khan 16th March 2004 03:02 PM

koi aage likhen plzzzzzzz.....

regards
Sahil Khan

Chaand 16th March 2004 05:27 PM

Ghazal ka 8th Sher

ik wafa ko pane ki koshish main main ne, zakhmi kar di hain wafain kitni
kitna masoom sa lagta hay ik lafz..MOHABBAT, or ik lafz se munsalik hay sazaain kitni

-Banjara

Na hua wo khayaaloN se juda, Na hua intezaar ka khaatma kabhi,
Na hua bewafa, ye kasoor hai iska..dil e barbaad ki khataaein kitni.

-Banno

Tumhari badulat diloN ka tadapna, zamane ki tarha hue tum sitamgar,
Takhti-e-dil pe hain darj-e-muradan, tum samjhoge kitni hum batayein kitni.

-Talib

Haaye wo samjhein hain na samjheinge, haal-e-bekasi kabhi
Be-ikhtyaari hamare sitam ki, chot khud bhi khayein ab sunaayein kitni

-Parastaar

Sau Khataaon ka silaa, ek sitaam aabhi hai baaki
ek jafa bewaafi ki, aGHlaat aur ginaayein kitni

-Mast

Patthar ko dhaRka kar dil bana de, phir dil ko banaaye sheesha bhi,
TooTe to ilzaam kismat ke naam, Ajab mohabbat ki adaaein kitni

Chandni mein dhala hua ek naazuk sa badan
Kis kis se bache peechhe hain nigaahen kitni

Sahil

Ab kya bataaeiN ke kin hadoN ko chhoo chuki haiN
Is ek mohobbat ke khaatir...apni khataaeiN kitni.

Parastaar 16th March 2004 06:37 PM

this ends the ghazal...pls start another Ghazal...khan bhai aap kijiey naa...

paras

Qasid 17th March 2004 01:25 AM

paras ji gusthakhi maaf apne khan bhai ko shuru karne ko kaha tha lekin aaj likhte hue ek ajeeb sa sher bana aur aage kya likhun samajh mein nahi aa raha hai...bahut ichaa hai ki yeh sher ek ghazal ka roop le aur umeed hai sab meri madad karenge...khan bhai aapka chance cheen raha hoon chota bhai samajh kar maaf kar dijiyega...

teri haathon ki mehndi nikhar aayi
mere naam ke akshaar badal gaaye

aage likhyega

aap sab ka aapna
-mast


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