Shayri.com - Ek aumer tak hum tereay talab-gaar rahy

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Ek aumer tak hum tereay talab-gaar rahy

Mari galtia mujh ko zaroor batayiye ga,
Aur markazi khial par ap agar kuch roshni daly tw kia he baat ho

Ek aumer tak hum tereay talab-gaar rahy,.........................Talabgar = Kwaish Mand
jab tw samnay aya to parishaa rahay

Rah-e-Khurd, ya kalb Ka intekhaab karo,...........................Rah-e-Khurd = Akal ka Rasta; Kalb = Dil; Intekhab = (Choice)
Is shesh-o-panj may jo doobay bemar rhay......................Shesh-o-Panj = (Confusion)

Sakoon-e-Kalab, hasil humy Q-Kar hota..............................Sakoon-e-Kalab = Dil ka sakoon; Q-Kar = Qu (Why)
Aadatay Apni he kuch aysi thi, K sharm-saar rahay.............Sharm-Saar = Sharminda

Apnaakey RA-ast Go-yee, jab hum jaha may nikly................RA-ast = Sach (Truth); Go-Yee = Guftagu (Conversation)
Guma na tha jaha phonchay, aur heraa rhay.......................Guma = Aumeed (Hope)

Nai-ya hamari Zee-St ke, kamiabi say Hum-kinar ho.............Nai-ya = Kashti (Boat); Zee-St = Zindagi (Life); Hum-Kinar = Kinary tak phochna
Jo Sabit Kadam hum SACH par, ta-hayat rahayN..................Sabit-Kadam = Mustikal-Mizaji (Ferm Dession); Ta-Hayaat = Aumer Bhar (Life Time)

Mr Nice Guy

hi,
thx for the link. i will come back to reply u soon.take care n may god bless u with his finnest glitters.
roshani

Dear Mr. Nice Guy...

Mujhe itna ilm nahin ki main aapko critique kar sakoon...aapne izzat bakshi tau kuch kehti chaloon...Yeh tau zaahir hai ki aapki urdu bahot achhi hai...khayaal bhi achhe hain...par aapke lafzon ke intekhaab mein thoda ulajh gaye hain...agar aap thoda saada likhein tau apni shayri mein aur nikhaar laa sakte hain...yeh jumla mujhe bahot pasand aaya...

Sakoon-e-Kalab, hasil humy Q-Kar hota
Aadatay Apni he kuch aysi thi, K sharm-saar rahay

aur shayri ke baare mein jaan na ho tau plz iss link par jaayein...

http://www.shayri.com/forums/showthr...&threadid=2125

Will you Correct Me ?
Hi Chansi Je,

I have just now posted a thread in Aap ke Shayri

I wish you correct me if i am wrong in it by any sense
I could be wrong idea, words, angle, style or any thing even spellings.

It’s a request to spare your precious time,
to full fill my apatite of getting better.

If you through some light on the Basic Idea “TRUTH”
It will be highly appreciated.

Link to the Thread
http://www.shayri.com/forums/showth...;threadid=42013

Mr Nice Guy

arre!!! aap bhi na bas ! mujhe khud kutch nahi aata urdu ya english poem ya hindi poem ===my way of writing is ===bas kooi khyaal mere dimaag main apne aap aata hai or main instently likhne lagti hoon .......jaisa likhti wo toh aap sabke saamne hai..........main khud bas likhti hoon ....mujhe khud kooi rules nahi pata ki ek poem main kya kya rules follow karne chaahiye .................bas itna pata rhyming words hone chaahiye .bas itna hin main jaanti hoon or kutch bhi nahi hahahahaha......................

issliye maine aapse kaha tha ki aap mere poems ko sahi karke bataaya kijiye ..................par aap toh gayab ho gaye ..........haan urdu sikhne ka bhi mann tha .............par aab nahi ...............behad mushkil hai urdu sikhna mere liye ........urdu words dhoondh liya or meaning bhi par fir bhi ..........poem nahi bana paai ..................huh!!!!!!! behad mushkil hai mere liye.......

so aapne jo likha hai achcha hin hai ................likhte rahiye .........

bye and tc .....................

dear nice guy...tumne bahaut accha likkha hai...urdu ka istemaal tumne bahaut khoobsurti se kiya hai....par saath hi saath yeh kahungi ke apne kalaam mein thoda saadgi laao...i mean use some light words along with few big urdu words ...that way it will sound more nice instead of making people confused with big words....
jo urdu ko bahaut acche se samajhte hain woh is kalaam ko bahaut pasand karenge lekin jinki urdu itni pukhta nahi hai unhe baar baar side mein likkhe meaning ko dekhna padega jisse padhne ka maza kam hojata...
lekin mujhe kafi pasand aya hai aur ummeed karti hoon ke tum aindah bhi acche se likkkhoge...take care...and if i have said too much then im sorry...bye:)

As usual bohot zabardast likha hai, is dafa tumhaarey spellings mai kohi mistake bhi nahi hai........
aur jahan tak shaahiri key baarey mera ilm hai wo yeh key bass shair key aakhri words milney chaahiyeh bass aur kuch nahi pata.

aur lafzon kaa intikhaab bhi bohot to bohot hi khoobsoorat hai magar in ko wahi jaan sakta hai jis ki urdu sey waaqfiyat hai wahi yeh jaan saktey hain key in lafzon kaa istimaal kitna khoobsoorat hai magar jo urdu sey waaqfiyat nahi rakhtey, un logon ko in words ki samajh nahi aahi ho gi laikin tumhaarey meaning likhney sey un logon ko samajh aa gayi ho gi.

keep writting!
take care
ALLAH hafiz

hi mr nice guy:)
thanx for d honour :) no doubt u have written too gud.. aur jaisa ki paras jine aur farhana ne kaha ki thoda saadgi laayenge to sach me aapke kalaam bemisaal lagenge :) spellings to khair aap dheere dheere hi correct kar paayenge.. sabhi ka padhte bhi honge aap.. to spellings ka sabke kalaam se andaaza ho jaayega :) agar kuchh galat keh diya ho to maaf kijiyega... lekin aapki shaayri sach me kaabil-e-taareef hai :)
khayaal rakhiye apna

Parastaar Je,

Arry ap ke shayri miny pardi hay.. bhoot zaberdast likhti hay Aap,
aur ap ka andazay bia bhi bhoot khoob hay.

Jab shayri shuro nahi ki the miny, tab mujh ko aisa lag ta tha kay..
Mushkil alfaz ko balance may istamal kar nay ko shayri kaha jata hay..

Phir mushkil alfazo ko istamal kar na sketa raha, jab thora bhot Aa gia.. tw ya samjh aya kay apni baat ko logo kay samny
ek khub-surat andaz say rakhna shayri hay...

Aap kay mashwary say mujh ko bilkul ya ahsas hua hay kay mujh ko aur salees (Simple) ho na chi hay, k zida say zida log is say istafada (Faida) hasil kary...

Aap kay sher kay intekhab say mujh ko ya hosla hua hay k,
Aap nay mayray is nazam ko likhnay ka maksad samjh lia hay
jis par may bhoot kush hoo.

Aap mujh ko zaroor batiye ga ap ko Mozu SACH kisa laga
aur kia apny phely sher say akheri tak lagta hay k ya nazam SACH par he hay.

Aap kay aur mashwaro aur islaho ka mumtazir raho ga,

Mr Nice Guy

Roshni Je

Aap kay nazrye ka may mumtazar raho ga,

Mr Nice Guy

Chandsi Je,

Nikami koi chez nahi is Kudrat kay Kar Kahanay may

Jab hum paida ho tay hay, hum ko kuch bhi nahi Aa ta
ya dunia he sab sekha ti hay, ab sekh tay hum utna hay
jitni hum may ta-kat hay ya phir shok.

Khial bhoot say Aa tay hay insaan ko puray din may jis may say sirf 20% kaam kay hoo tay hay aur zida tar bila waja Aa tay hay
ab hamara kaam hay kay un ko zida say zida achi aur apna aur dosro kay fiday wali baat sochay.

Ek punjabi sher hay
Sachia tay Gordia......Gordia = Ghari (Deep)
Gala kariye Koolia......Koolia = Methi (Sweet)

:Translation:
Hum sachi aur ghari,
piar mohabat wali batay kary

jaha tak hay may ap ko sahi karoo.. tw ya gardi u he chalti hay
kay ap mujh ko aur may ap ko correct karoo..
mujh ko "wa wa" say zida pasand ya baat hay kay koi mujh ko correct kary

Aur mira ya mashwara hay ap kisi ko correct kar k dekhay..
ap ko aur bhi nai chezay sekh nay ko miliy gi..
ho sak ta hay ap ko pata bhi na chaly aur ap ko urdu Aa jaye.

Aap nay is nazam kay aunwan par koi roshni nahi dali,
miray top most favriot topic hay SACH

Mr Nice Guy

Farhana Je,

Mujh ko ap kay aur Parastaar je K mashwaray say..
apni isla kar nay ka moka mila hay
jis k liye may ap dono ka bhoot shukar guzar hoo

may zaroor ainda jo nazam logo k liye likho ga
us may Aam faham alfaz istamal karo ga

Wisay jo log ahely zuban hay
un kay liye mayri is nazam may sirf 3 alfaz mushkil hay

Rah-e-Khurd
RA-ast Go-yee
Zee-St

baki sab tw suny sunaaye hay,

Aap say ya ilteja karoo ga,
kay is nazam kay mozu par SACH
mari kuch rahanumai kary.

Aur Jaha tak ap ko lag ta hay kay may ap ke baat ko bura manoo ga tw aisa nahi hay, agar baat may isla ka phelo hoo tw may jitni bhi KARDHWI baat sunay ko tiar hoo..

Mr Nice Guy

Star sahab,

Shukria mari hosla-afzai ka,
jab ap nay hai mujh ko spelings theek kar ky de hay tw,
kaha say mistakes nikly ge.

shukria.. mayri spelings to theek kar kay day nay ka

Aap nay bhi is nazam k markazi khial
par koi izharay khial nahi kia
jis ka may muntazar hoo.

Mr Nice Guy

Pallavi Je,

Shukria ap ke hosla-afzai ka,

May zaroor ainda sahal (asan) alfaz istamal karo ga apni nazmo may,

Jee spellings ka ya socha hay kay post kar nay say phley kisi say
theek kar wa lia karoo ga, jiye ya STAR je say theek karwi thee.

Jaha may galat hoo, waha ap ke takeed say bhetar koi baat nahi,
tw bila jh-jik jo mahsoos kary bata diye kary.

Lakin ap say ek guzarish hay,
Nazam K markazi khial SACH par kitni puri autri

Mr Nice Guy

Mr. Nice Guay

bhai aap ka behad shukriyaa ke aap meri tawajja apne is kalam ki taraf mabzool karaayee.
aap ke kalam ko parh ker mujhe naheen laga ke yeh aap ne pehli dafa likha hai. aap ne alfaaz ka bohat behter istemaal kiyaa hai, qaafiyaa bhi khoob milaayaa hai, bas baat yeh hi hai jo meri behan paras ne aap se ki hai, ke filhaal kyunke aap no-aazmooda hain is sinf e sukhan mein to behter yeh hai ke alfaaz saada istemaal karein/ yeh ziaayaada behter ho gaa aap ke liye.
bas itna kahoon gaa ke mujhe zaati taur per aap ka andaaz e bayaan bohat pasand aayaa aur mein umeed kerta hoon ke aap is mehfil mein ek bohat achcha izaafaa saabit honge.
aap ne apne ek misre mein lafz guma na istemaal kiyaa hai, ghaliban aap gumaan kehna chahte they, shayed sehwan spelling mistake ho gaee hai. sahi lafz gumaan hai aur yeh aap ke shayr mein sahi fit bhi ho raha hai.
meri dua hai ke aap hamesha khush rahein aur isi tarah achcha aur sachcha likhte rahein.

musharrafhusain

Quote:

aap ek kaam kijiye apne poem ka meaning hindi main likh dijiye or fir shayd main
sach ko samjh paauon ..........................

sach kehna mitha bolna itna aasaan nahi ..................jaise pyaar karna
itna aasaan nahi .....................

ye dono aag ki dariyaa ke samaan hai .....................jo kaafi takliif deh
hai ................ek sach bolk ke toh dekho .........ek bheed ke khilaaf
.........................mout ko paane ko ji chaahega ..................mitha
bol ke toh dekho uske saath jo keval aapka bura chahta hai ...............nahi
hota nice guy.................behad katheen hai ye sab ..............

kavitaayein likhna or jo likha hai usse kar dikhaane main farak hai
.......................kabhi aazmaa ke dekhiye .................

hum likhte hai kavitaao main ki insaaniyat bani rahe ..............par khud
insaaniyat kho dete hian .................

hum likhte hian ..........aurtoon ko izzat deni chaahiye ...........par khud hin
apne ghar main apne ghar ki mahiilaao ko wo pyaar wo samman nahi de paate khush
nahi rakh paate ...........

samaaj ke baare main likhte hian ..................ki samaaz dushit ho gaya hai
...............kaisa ho gaya hai .................par kahin na kahin hum bhi
isse dushit karte hain ......................

abhi delhi main huaa jo kaand ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,kutch kavi bas gaane lage apni
rachnaaye sunaane lage ......................but keval rachna likhne se ya gaane
se kutch nahi hoga ................hum sabko kutch na kutch koshish karna
chaahiye ........................

dosti karte hian par dost ko samjh nahi paate ................uski ek bhi galti
ko seh nahi paate ................or dosti pe bade bade kavitaain likh dein toh
kya faayda ......................

insaan banna jaroori hai ..............mazboori ...........galtiyouno ko
.samjhna jaroori hai ..............ek dusre ke maan ko aadar dena jaroori
hai ..........

sorry itna kkeh gayi ..............but jab aap baar baar sabko sach sach keh
rahe the toh bas raha nahi gaya ...............

Chandsi je,

Har koi khay ta hay Sach bolo
sach ka saat do, sach samnay laoo
lay kin Jab kardhwa sach saam-nay Aaa-ta hay tw
ghabra ja tay hay, k ab is ko kisay pieo

Jab masla(Problem) kisi aur ka hota hay tw khay tay hay
ya Tala(Lock) tw Sach ke chabi(Key) say he khola jaye ga
aur jab masla apna Aa jaye tw
sach ke chabi ko chupa kar,
Hushayri/Chalaki ke chabi say wo tala khola jata hay

Sach, Sach, ka nara laga na tw asan hay
Lay kin sach par Amal(Pratice) kar na
jisa K Aap nay kaha bhoot mushkil hay

Piaar karna bhoot he zida asan hay
magar Piar nabahana utna he mushkil hay

Metha bolna, bilkul aisay hay jisay K Jadu(Magic)
aur Jadu, dushman ya dost dono par ho sak ta hay

May kohih kar ta ho K wo he likhoo.. jo may kar sak ta hoo
ya jo may dekh ta hoo, may khialo ke dunia may
nahi rhay na chata.

May wa wa sun-nay kay liye kavita nahi likh ta
q k mari baat koi Aam alfaz may nahi sunna chata
ya yaad nahi kar sakta, issi liye may nay kaveta ka sahara lia
miray liye in shero say zida important un kay minay(Meanings) hay
un kay pechay chupa massage hay,

Aap nay akhri line jis may Sorry kaha,,
mujh ko acha nahi laga
Sach bata kar Sorry nahi boltay
is say u lag ta hay jo ap nay kaha wo galat tha.

Har isan kay Kush Buniadi(Basic) Asool hotay hay
kafi log apny he bunadi asolo ko nahi jantay
jis par may ek kaveta likh na chata hoo

Abhi tw itna he likha hay:
Jo Fiqar ho tujh ko, K Fiqar kasay karo
HAr Fiqar ko Aunwa day-k Tamam Kar
Translation:
...Agar tum ya soch tay ho k socha kisay jaye
...tw apni soch ko (heading) day kar samjh lo
...aur wo asani say solve ho jaye ga

Mari kohih hoo te hay log SACH ko
apna Constitution bana lay
ya ni koi bhi asool(Rule) bna-nay say phely
wo ya chek kary kay wo rule
Sach kay khilaf tw nahi ja raha hay

iSi liye may Sach Sach bol ta phir raha ho

As you have asked to translate the Kaveta in simple here it is:

Hum Sach dhoond tay rhay tay hay zindagi may
jab wo Ainay(Mirror) ke thara samnay Aa ja ta hay,
tw parishan hoo ja tay hay, apny cheray par
jhoot ka nikab dekh kar.

Ab hum is confusion may pardh ja tay hay
K sach ko apnaya jaye ya kay nahi
Dil aur demakh ki is jang may
hum bemar hoo ja tay hay
aur kamzor bhi.

ya baat hum ko samjh Aa jate hay kay
mujh ko zindagi may saook isiliye nahi mila
q k may jhoot bolta, apnay ek rupay kay fiday kay liye
logo ka lakho ka nuksan kar day ta
aj jab sach nay mujh ko ya saaf saaf bata dia
tw hum sharminda ho ja tay hay apny kiye par

Ab hum ko samjh Aa gia hamari galti
aj say hum sach boly gay
(Sach bol kar Sorry nahi boly gay.. lollz)

jab hum nay sach ko apni zindagi may istamal kia
tw socha bhi nahi tha jitni kamiabi aur izaat mili
isiliye heaarn hoo gay, kay hum ko SACH ke takat ka
andaza bhi nahi tha.

ab agar hum zindagi bhar SACH ko apny say door na honay day
tw hamari zindagi safal/Kamiab hoo jaye ge.

Mr Nice Guy

ji Mr Nice Guy

Aap ney markazi khayaal ki baat ki hai to aap ki is nazm kaa jo markazi khayal hai wo bilkul juda hai yaa "hat key" hai.......
no lovy dovy sort of thing. Yeh nazm/ghazal topic sach pey likhi hooi hai wo sach jo sach hai. jis ko face karna mushkil hota hai.

merey zaihan mai sach key mutaliq kuch aa rha hai likh rha hoon

Kabhi seep mai bhi chuppa hai sach seep(sea shell)
Kabhi roz-e-mehshar saa uryan hai sach roz-e-mehshar(The last day) uryan(some thing that can be seen)
(aap kaa style copy kar rha hoon)
Kabhi aankh sey dekhaa gaya na sach
Kabhi kabhi dil ney bhi uglaa hai sach uglaa(to speak)

Kabhi kabhi to sach bhi hooa na sach
Kabhi paaniyon mai behta mila sach paaniyon(seas, rivers)

Kabhi aasmaano mai milta hai sach
Kabhi zamin pey naa mila hai sach

Aaj dekho, key har kohi chupaata hai sach
Is duniya sey rukhsat, chaahata hai sach Rukhsat(leave)

hope u will like it

take care
ALLAH hafiz

Posting again

ji Mr Nice Guy

Aap ney markazi khayaal ki baat ki hai to aap ki is nazm kaa jo markazi khayal hai wo bilkul juda hai yaa "hat key" hai.......
no lovy dovy sort of thing. Yeh nazm/ghazal topic sach pey likhi hooi hai wo sach jo sach hai. jis ko face karna mushkil hota hai.

merey zaihan mai sach key mutaliq kuch aa rha hai likh rha hoon

Kabhi seep mai bhi chuppa hai sach
Kabhi roz-e-mehshar saa uryan hai sach
seep(sea shell), roz-e-mehshar(The last day), uryan(some thing that can be seen)

(aap kaa style copy kar rha hoon)

Kabhi aankh sey dekhaa gaya na sach
Kabhi kabhi dil ney bhi uglaa hai sach
uglaa(to speak)

Kabhi kabhi to sach bhi hooa na sach
Kabhi paaniyon mai behta mila sach
paaniyon(seas, rivers)

Kabhi aasmaano mai milta hai sach
Kabhi zamin pey naa mila hai sach

Aaj dekho, key har kohi chupaata hai sach
Is duniya sey rukhsat, chaahata hai sach
Rukhsat(leave)

hope u will like it

take care
ALLAH hafiz

arre ye kya ? aapne mera mail yahan kyoun post kar diya ??????????///

not done !!

agar mujhe ye sab sabke saath share karna hota toh main khud hin na post kar deti ........................

mujhe pasand nahi aaya aapka ye baat ki aapne personal mail yahan post kar diya bina puche .............................

its ok agar kooi jhooth kehta hai par kisi ka bura nahi karta

kaai baar jhooth bhi kisi ko jindagi de deta hai toh jhooth kehna itna bura bhi nahi .......................

jo insaan dil se achche hain wo humesha achcha hin karte hain.....................

or fir hum sab insaan hin hai mjbooriyouse sangharsh karte huye ..............

main bas khuda ko maanti hoon .......................bas un se hin darti hoon ..................unse hin baate karti hoon ................kya sahi kitni sahi bas unko hin pata hai hum sab ka hisaab kitaab ..................

mr nice guy .................aab plz mujhe reply yahan nahi mail karke dijiyega ..........plz its a request .....................

bye and tc

Star Mia,

Bhoot acha laga, Aap nay bhi Sach par likha

Aaj dekho, key har kohi chupaata hai sach
Is duniya sey rukhsat, chaahata hai sach

----------------------------------------------------------------

Ek jo Wada kia, par wafa na kia,
Hack kisi ka aj tak ada na kia,
Naam badal day na, jo hum nay
Ibles ko apna mureed bana na dia
(Mr Nice Guy)

Waki may aj hum nay Shetan ko bhi,
pechay chordh dia hay.

Mr Nice Guy

Musharrafhusain sahab,

Bhoot shukria Aap ke hosla afzai ka, aur isla ka.

Mayri ya phely nazam nahi hay, haa miny shero shari karna isi site par Aa kar shuro ki hay.

Mushkil alfaz istamal kar na koi buri baat nahi, jab tak un ka theek istamal kia jaye.
Par ya zaroor hay.. mushkil shero say log moo pher lay tay hay.
jo k ek Fitri amal hay.

May ainda puri kohih karo ga kay ba-mina magar kam as kam mushkil alfazo ko istamal kar tay huy kuch likho.

Inshlla may ap ke aumeed par khara autru ka.

Bhoot zida shukria khay na chaho ga may ap ka,
kay ap nay mari isla ki, ap nay bilkul durust farmaya
mayry likhnay may galti hui hay, lafz Gumaan he durust hay
ek bar phir bhoot shukria.

Mr Nice Guy