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maikasH
Birha Tu Sultan
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Posts: 1,803
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: India : Mohali,Punjab--Now:Leeds,UK
Rep Power: 10
14th January 2013, 04:05 PM

aadaab Ahmad bhai,

maine Masood Hassas bhai se darkhuvaast ki thi ke voh aapki is kaavish par tabsira kareiN, unhone mujhe yeh khat bheja hai kyoNke unke wahaaN se post nahiiN ho paa raha tha

yeh raha unka khat :



AADAAB

Jalaa kar khoon e dil hi she’r likhta hai koyi shaayir
Jo haq bhar daad na paaye bade takleef hoti hai


Jahaan tak mujhe yaad aa raha hai ye sher achaanak meri zabaan se us waqt nikla tha jab main delhi me vikas zidd bhai lucky and kunal ke saath baitha huwa tha aor aaj jab sdc pe aana huwa to wahi sher yaad aa gaya

Ji haan sher dil se kaha jata hai aor daad na milne pe takleef hona laazmi hai magar us ke kuchh osool hain agar un ka paalan kiya jaaye to daad zaroor mile gi

Khaas taour pe GHAZAL ka apna osool hai us ko saamne rakh ke agar kalaam kaha gaya hai tab to ghazal hai warna wo GHAZAL nahi hai

Is khulaasey ke baad aata hun aap ki ghazal pe



Bataa tu bhi aakhir pashemaan kyoon hai,
Mitaaker tu mujhko pareshaan kyoon hai


Bahot achhey khoobsoorat sher hai


Wafa kay silay mayn jafaa daykay mujhko
Jagaa tayray andar yay eemaan kyoon hai


Theek laayeq e daad


Bana kay tu muflis mujhay poochta hai,
Yay chaak mayraa giraybaan kyoon hai


Ab dekhiye yahaan aap BAHR se bhatak gaye …..khaas taour pe doosra misra aap ka wazn me nahi kiun ki aap ka wazn hai

122—122—122-122

Doosra misra is pe dekhiye to aap ko ehsaas ho jaaye ga ki aap se kiya ghalati huyi hai


Jalakay yay gulshan meraa soachtaa hai,
Yay jhulsaa huaa sa biyabaan kyoon hai


Theek achha sher


Aa turbat pay mayree karay fikr kyun tu,
Basayra yay Ahmad ka viraan kyuun hai


Ek baat ka dheyaan den …HAR WO ALIF JIS PE ***MADD*** ( AAM AAS AAP ) AA JAAYE WO KABHI BHI NAHI GIR SAKTAA

Aor aap ne AA ko 1 le liya hai is liye yahaan bhi aap ko dekhnaa hogaa

Doosrey sher me aap ne lafz BASEYRAA istemaal kiya hai

Ab ye bataa dun ki har lafz ki eyk HAQEEQAT O MAAHIYAT / MANA AAFREENI hoti hai usi ke liye us ka istemaal ho sakta hai jab jab MANA aafreeni me jhol aaye gaa sher apni HASIYAT kho de ga

Aap dekhiye ki BASEYRAA ki jagah to Viraan ho sakti hai khud Baseyraa nahi..

Is liye yahaan bhi nazr e saani ki haajat hai

Aap ki taqtee ke liye eyk osool bataa deta hun ye sirf aap ke liye hi nahi balki sdc pe tamaam visit karne waaloN ke kaam aaye gi

Koi bhi lafz ki sirf 2 haalat hoto hai ..ki us ke HARF yaa to akele hain yaa kisi se mile hain ..micaal ke taour pe NIGAHBAAN me noon kisi se nahi milaa hai us ke baad GAAF hai jo ki apne baad aane waale HAA se milaa hai jo akela ho gaa wo 1 mana jaaye gaa jo kisi se mila hogaa wo 2 tasleem hogaa

Ni1 ----gah2----- baa2 ------n1

Noon ke zer thaa aor kisi se mila nahi tha to 1 huwa jab ki GAAF apne baad aane waale HAA se milaa thaa to 2 huwaa us ke baad BAA hai jo apne baad aane waale ALIF se mila hai to zaahir hai 2 hogaa akheer me NOON hai jo kisi se nahi milaa hai to 1 hi hogaa

Is tarah

Ni1 ----gah2 ----baa2----n1

Ho gaya

Agar kisi saahab ko ye samajh me na aaya ho to wo koi bhi LAFZ le ke us ke bare me pooch saktey hain


Yaqeen kijiye agar aap ko ye 1-2 karna aa gaya to aap kisi aor ke muhtaaj na hongey balki khud apne kalaam ki BAHR ko saheeh kar saktey hain

Tawajjoh se parhne ke liye shukriya

Masoodhassaas Kuwait


.........................................

is tarhe teri yaad meiN har shaam dhaley hai
goyaa koyi nagin si kalejey pe chaley hai

maikash
...............................

Last edited by maikasH; 14th January 2013 at 04:08 PM..
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