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Pradhyuman
'Bismil'
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6th August 2014, 02:14 PM

Hi All,

It took me some time (almost a day) to locate the original thread. I read all competing creations, judgement & the resulting comments.

This is what I have to say. Atleast there is life now and SDC is breathing again.

There's something new & interesting I learned about Shayri from Ufaq's reply. And I thank Nazneen for that.

There was a time when I used to give undue importance to my own words & protected them. Now I focus on keeping it's breeding ground pure. The mind. I mean the heart part of my mind!

Cheers!
Pradhyuman

Quote:
Originally Posted by ufaq View Post
Zainy ji ..main jaanta hu ki aapne kisi aur ko kuch post karne se manaa kiya hai...phir bhi post kar raha hu.....is huqmfarmaani Ke liye....muaafi....
Shaad sahib..Ko muaafinaama likhne Ke liye bolna ya unka maafinaama tasleem karna ghalat hai...jis tarah naazneen sahiba Ke favour me kuch members bole....usii tarah. Shaad sahib bhi mere favour me bole...Agar nazneen sahiba ko sorry bolne Ke liye kahaa jaata hai to as her counterpart ..mujhe sorry bolna chahiye....na ki Shaad sahib ko....
sorry...not for what happened here
Not for u zainy jii
For only welfere of SDC... Again sorry

Ab aakhiri baar .....I repeat aakhiri baar naaz Jii Ke mukhaatib hona chaahata hu.....poori tahaziib aur adab Ke saath

Naaz Jii ....aap aisa kaise soch sakti hai ki Maine aapko jaan-boojhkar 2nd position par aane se ROK liye.....kyaa meri aapse koi zaati dushmani hai?????
Hamare biich na hi kabhi koi difference aaye the....aur na hi hasan Ji meri friendslist me hai..ki main unhe jaanboojhkar favour karu

Surf aapke aur hasan Ke sher ki comparison karte hai......

Shaairi me adaayagi nibhaane Ke do taur hai..PAHLA.... sehal e mumtana ....Doosra maani e aafrini ........

Sehal e mumtana ....us sher Ko kahaa jaata hai...Jab shaair koi baat bilkul aasan lehje me kah jaata hai.....jaise hasan Ji ne kahaa hai......kaun aayega ab safar kare Ke....KYA KHOOB misra hai....hasan Ji Ka oola kuch kamzor rah gayaa warna main unhe is sher Ke 10 me se 8 marks deta.....

Maani e aafrini.......us sher ko kahaa jaata hai jab shaair symbols Ka use karke....apni baat thoda complicated taariqe se kahane ki koshish karta hai......maani e aafrini ashaar ko sehl e mumtana ashaar se behtar maana jaata hai....lekin isko nibhaana bahut muskil hai..AAPNE bhi maani e aafrini sher kahane ki koshish ki hai....aur badqismati se aap kaamyaab na ho saki....

Aap kahati hai ....I respected ufaq.....agar aapne kabhi ek minute Ke liye meri respect ki hai to yaqeen maaniye....aap ye sher nibhaane me naqqamyaab rahii.....aap har padne wale Ke saamne jaakar apna ashaar nahi khol sakti.....aapko do misro'n me apni baat saaf karni hai....yahi sher Ka husn hai...aur is husn ko.....EJAJ E IKHTISAAR kahate hai......ye husn aate -aate aata hai.......aapko ...ek salaah hai...agar Achchi lage to maan Lena warna meri bakwaas samajh Ke bhool jaaiyega......abhi aap mubtadi daur ki shaaira hai....maani e aafrini SHE'R kahane ki koshish mat kariye...is tarah Ke sher kahane Ke liye Ghalib Ke standard tak pahuchna padta hai...

Ek baat aur saaf kar du ki technical aspect ( bahr , qaafia ) alag cheez hai...Maine technical aspects par marking nahi ki....aapke sher me Jo kami hai....WO bayaani ki kami hai....

Ye ilzaam bilkul bebuniyaad hai...ki Maine sher ko nahi...shaair ko marks diye hai....
Aapko yaad dila du.....last tpt me jab main aur zidd judges they ..to winners...the.....sumit anzaan , aur Ahmad shakil......wahaa'n hame nahi pataa thaa ki
Ghazal kiski hai....but Jo winner rahe ..we SDC Ke aala shaair rahe....ye mahaz itefaaq nahi hai.....generally....umda shaair hi umda sher likhte hai.....

Naaz Ji... ..agar aapko koi doubt tha to aap mujhse pm karke poochh sakti thii....aur yahi sher kyun....kisi bhi sher par koi bhi doubt aap mujhe pm karke poochh sakti thii.......khair chhodiye Jo hua so huya.....

Shaairi mera shauq nahi...meri ibaadat hai...main apni ibaadat se dhoka nahi kar sakta....Maine koi partiality nahi ki.....Bas yahi sach hai


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gore ghareeban hai ye 'bismil', kyun tu naashaad nazar aata hai?
musht-e-khaak hai basi yahan, bata kahan fuwaad nazar aata hai?
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Last edited by Pradhyuman; 6th August 2014 at 02:20 PM..