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(#1)
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~$uper M0der@tor~
  
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Posts: 8,417
Join Date: Feb 2006
Rep Power: 61
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18th August 2014, 01:06 PM
Quote:
behad inaayat hai aapki pazeeraai aur pasandeedgii pe zarraa saahab...... wese aapki paarkhi nazar ka main qaayal ho gaya hoon.. kis gharaai me aap utar gaye jahaan tak shaayd main bhi utraa tha is sher ko likhne me, lekin tajjub uus baat ka hai ke aapne ise catch kar liyaa..... ye hunar kisii sacche shaayar me hi ho sakta hai jo dusre shayar k jazbaaton ko copy kar sake.... i am glad to have you and your blessings...... thanks once again do keep coming and sharing your views... Shaad.... |
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(#2)
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Registered User
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18th August 2014, 07:00 PM
Quote:
 mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#3)
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Registered User
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Location: Mumbai, India
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19th August 2014, 01:23 PM
Quote:
Shoaibbhai, bahot hi sahej si baat magar khub gehraai se bayaaN kii hai..... dheron daad-o-mubaarakbaad ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता 
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(#4)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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18th August 2014, 11:08 PM
~*almiyaa*~
shehar meiN badhati khusk-saali ko dekhte, parindoN ka aik tolaa sir joD ke betha hai! num aankhoN se kar raha hai aah-o-fugaaN, 'Qafas' meiN do waQt ka rizQ to naseeb ho jata tha!  tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#5)
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Registered User
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19th August 2014, 12:15 AM
Quote:
mujhe personally jo ehsaas shayari mein sab se zyada pasand hai wo hai irony ka ehsaas (only a personal opinion, not prescriptive at all) ... aur aap ke qalaam mein is qadar dil ko cheer dene waali irony hai, jo ise bahaut khaas bana deti hai meri nigaah mein. alfaaz ke taur pe bhi, "khushk-saali" aur "num aankhon" ki irony bhi khoob lagi !! WAAAH !! Dheron daad Hassan bhai !! mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#6)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
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19th August 2014, 05:52 PM
Quote:
khaak lafzooN ko iss qadar wuQQat bakhshne ke liye be-had mamnooN hoon! aap ki tareef aur daad sir aankhoN per! Milte rahiye ga,, DuaooN ke saath, tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#7)
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~$uper M0der@tor~
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Rep Power: 61
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19th August 2014, 12:25 PM
Quote:
Shaad.... |
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(#8)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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19th August 2014, 05:55 PM
Quote:
dil ki attaH gehraiyoN se manooN hooN! Milte rahiye,, DuaooN ke saath,, tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#9)
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Registered User
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Location: Mumbai, India
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19th August 2014, 01:48 PM
Quote:
bahot hi aalaa khayaal bayaaN kiya hai, Hassanbhai...... dheroN dheroN daad............. ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#10)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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19th August 2014, 05:57 PM
Quote:
Daad aur hausla afzaai liye bohat bohat shukriyaaH! Milte rahiye ga, DuaooN ke saath, tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#11)
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~$uper M0der@tor~
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19th August 2014, 12:28 PM
Zarraa saahab.... Qafas ke lihaaz se ek adnaa si koshish dekhiye.....
ik khooon me bheege qafas ko dekh kar sochaa kiye, Mar mar miTey kitne parinde zindagee ke waaste.....!! Shaad..... |
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(#12)
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Location: Mumbai, India
Rep Power: 22
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19th August 2014, 01:46 PM
Quote:
kya khubsurat fasafaanaa khayaal pesh kiya hai, Shoaibbhai..... kya adaaegii hai, kya manzar hai, kya tegh hai iis sher meN....... dheroN dheroN daad-o-mubaarakbaad hamari jaanibse qubul farmaaiye ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#13)
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19th August 2014, 06:23 PM
Quote:
khoon mein bheega qafas, mar mitey zindagi ke waaste ... an iconic statement !!! ye sher sulagta hua shola bhi hai, aansoo ka nam qatra bhi hai aur dard bhari khoon ki dhaar bhi hai !!! is par anginat daad nisaar Shaad bhai !!! mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#14)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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19th August 2014, 06:28 PM
Quote:
bas daad hi daad.. because I'm speechless! tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#15)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
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Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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19th August 2014, 08:32 PM
ae insaan! hum haiN aadi-e-qafas, azaadi nahi humeN matloob!
yeHi guzar basar hai apna! bahir nikle to mar na jayeN gay!?? matloob : desire tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#16)
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Registered User
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19th August 2014, 08:53 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#17)
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19th August 2014, 09:00 PM
doston ... waise to lafz "qafas" par guftagoo ka aaj aakhiri din tha, par abhi tak qafas mein aashaar ke panchhee pharhpharhaa rahe hain
ye bahaut hi khushi ki baat hai kyunki is se ye baat zaahir hoti hai ki kis shiddat shauq aur junoon se mashq e sukhan chal rahi hai to is lafz par ghaur karne ka silsila 1 din aur bardha dete hain, yaani kal 20th Aug raat 9:00 PM India time ya 3:30 PM GMT tak .... tab tak qafas mein parwaaz jaari rakhiye yaaran-e-chaman mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#18)
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Location: Mumbai, India
Rep Power: 22
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20th August 2014, 12:39 PM
Quote:
Hassanbhai, kya khub sher taamir kiya hai....... daad qubul kijiye... ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#19)
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Location: Mumbai, India
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20th August 2014, 10:20 AM
na chaman rahaa na qafas rahe ye parinde aaj yateem hue
mere saamne ye ujaR gayaa mere saamne wo tabaah hue ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#20)
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20th August 2014, 01:43 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#21)
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20th August 2014, 11:00 AM
par katartaa kyuN hai ae saiyaad tu
jab qafas hi hai thikaanaa ban gayaa sajaane do qafas-aaraa ko phir aaj qafas meN bhii zaraa si taazgii ho qafas-ba-dosh* hi to saiyaad ka azaab rahaa mera to aaj qafas-zaad** phir khitaab rahaa (*cage on shoulder, **born in cage) ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#22)
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20th August 2014, 01:46 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#23)
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20th August 2014, 11:19 AM
tiiliyaaN ginte ginte chaman tang hue
waaN bayaabaaN hue yaaN qafas zang hue ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#24)
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20th August 2014, 01:47 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#25)
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20th August 2014, 12:28 PM
shor-e-parind sun, ki kahiN ittihaam* mera
leke qafas na aaye ho saiyaad baaG meN (*suspicion) ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#26)
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20th August 2014, 01:49 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#27)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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20th August 2014, 07:19 PM
Quote:
wahhh.. bohat khoob. tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#28)
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20th August 2014, 08:07 PM
Quote:
Aur waah ! Kya zabardast sher kaha aap ne ! Agar ghar ka raasta chhoot jaaye to qafas ke hi aasre rehte hain ... aur kab qafas qafas hote hue bhi ghar ban jaata hai !!! Bahaut khoob !!! Dher saari daad !! aur ye bhi bahaut achchha hua ki bilkul in the "nick of time" aap ka khoobsurat sher humein mil gaya ... kyunki bas 1 ghante mein hum agle lafz par jaane waale hain mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#29)
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Location: Mumbai, India
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21st August 2014, 09:32 AM
Quote:
kitnii khubsurti se aur asaan lafzoN meN ek gehrii baat bayaaN kii hai...... dheroN daad-o-mubaarakbaad. DuaaoN ke saath, Adil ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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Welcome back Naaz! |
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(#30)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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Welcome back Naaz! -
20th August 2014, 08:24 PM
kuch haseeN khwaab saja bethe haiN tere sung ae koyal!
yeH qafas ab humeN jaaN se bhi piyaara lagne laga hai! tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#31)
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20th August 2014, 08:26 PM
Quote:
mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#32)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Posts: 3,133
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Location: Shehr-e-husn
Rep Power: 44
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20th August 2014, 08:42 PM
Change of mood zarraa saheb…
qafas meiN beetay sitam, tumhe dikhaa to nahi saktay! bas itnaa jaan loH, andar se toot ke chhuur ho chukka hooN…. tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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(#33)
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20th August 2014, 09:08 PM
Quote:
waah !! jo sitam andar se torh dein unhein koyee kaise dikhaaye !! Bahaut khoob Hassan bhai !!mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#34)
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Some Mirrors Lie...
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Location: Shehr-e-husn
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20th August 2014, 09:12 PM
Quote:
Jee bikul Zarraa saheb.... dard hotaa to hai lekin dikhta nahi hai...... kuch iss taraH ki kafiyat shair meiN biyaaN karne ki koshish ki hai.. aap ko pasand aaya .. bohat acha laga! tumhara shoq dekha to ghazal hum ne nazar kar di! kabhi fursat meiN sun lena, bohat ashaar baqi haiN... ("Asad") |
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lafz "qafas" par members ke aashaar ... |
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(#35)
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lafz "qafas" par members ke aashaar ... -
20th August 2014, 09:29 PM
doston ... lafz "qafas"par members ke khud ke kahe huwe aashaar ...
na qafas kaa kHauf jinko na chaman kii chaah rakhte maiN guloN se puchhtaa hooN wo parinde ab kahaaN hai Aadeil ye qafas hai raen-basera aur maiN taaIr e dil jo chaman se uD ke khud aa mila sayyaad se Aadeil kamar se baandh ke wo khinch rahaa suunaa qafas e ruuh kise uthaanee hai azaab is sard murde baar ki Aadeil ab sabaa bhii azaab lagne lagii ye qafas aashiyaanaa lagne lagaa Aadeil naye naye ashiyaane ko maiN saraab samjhaa qafas qafas-aaraa samjhe maiN to azaab samjhaa Aadeil jabiin e khaaksii meN ek jabiin e saNg bhii aisa yahaaN nazr e qafas jaaN aur safhaa e dahr dikhaataa hai Aadeil chaman meN baith ke jo kar rahaa thaa roz guloN se baat qafas kii tiiliyoN ke saath baaNtoo wo puraani yaad Aadeil teri yaadoN ke qafas meiN aise jakray haiN jese zanjeereN jo lipti haiN paaoN se humeN virsaa meiN mili hooN Hassan pade saiyyaad jab piichhe parinde ko samajh aaya Qafas me'n hi raha hota bhala hota bura hota Ufaq mujhko rahane hi De baaho.n me yu apni daayam Tu qafas kholke panchhi ko udaata kyun hai Ufaq deed e falak navardee ki lazzat chali gayi To kyaa huya qafas me'n agar andliib hai Ufaq Qafas meiN qaid panchi ki khaber rakhna, ae saheb! mazloom ki aah farsh to kia arsh tak hilaa deti hai Hassan Rooh ka dard kisiii ko nazar nahii aataa Qafas me qaid ye bulbul bahot tadaptee hai Shaad shaq o gumaaN ke qafas khud bana liye hum ne falak ko choomte girne ka jo n dar hota Zarraa sabhi hum nasheen e chaman mere deiN qafas ki haNs ke mubaarakeiN mujhe baaghbaaN saiyaad ki hai barhe jatan se safaayee de Zarraa shehar meiN badhati khusk saali ko dekhte parindoN ka aik tolaa sir joD ke betha hai num aankhoN se kar raha hai aah o fugaaN Qafas meiN do waQt ka rizQ to naseeb ho jata tha Hassan ik khooon me bheege qafas ko dekh kar sochaa kiye Mar mar miTey kitne parinde zindagee ke waaste Shaad ae insaan hum haiN aadi e qafas azaadi nahi humeN matloob yeHi guzar basar hai apna! bahir nikle to mar na jayeN gay Hassan na chaman rahaa na qafas rahe ye parinde aaj yateem hue mere saamne ye ujaR gayaa mere saamne wo tabaah hue Aadeil par katartaa kyuN hai ae saiyaad tu jab qafas hi hai thikaanaa ban gayaa Aadeil sajaane do qafas-aaraa ko phir aaj qafas meN bhii zaraa si taazgii ho Aadeil qafas-ba-dosh hi to saiyaad ka azaab rahaa mera to aaj qafas-zaad phir khitaab rahaa Aadeil tiiliyaaN ginte ginte chaman tang hue waaN bayaabaaN hue yaaN qafas zang hue Aadeil shor-e-parind sun, ki kahiN ittihaam mera leke qafas na aaye ho saiyaad baaG meN Aadeil Kis tarah maiN todta qafas ka aasraa Aye kaash key yaad hota ghar ka raastaa N@zneen kuch haseeN khwaab saja bethe haiN tere sung ae koyal yeH qafas ab humeN jaaN se bhi piyaara lagne laga hai Hassan qafas meiN beetay sitam, tumhe dikhaa to nahi saktay bas itnaa jaan loH, andar se toot ke chhuur ho chukka hooN Hassan aap sabhi shora ka behad mamnoon o mashqoor hoon ki aap ke khoobsurat qalaam se "qafas" ko bhi gulshan bana diya Aadeil bhai ne phir se aashaar ki ek anjuman bana di, unhone 13 aashaar farmaaye.jin meherbaanon ne tashreef laakar hum shora ki hausla afzaayee kari aur jin saathiyon ne is koshish ko pardhne ki izzat bakshi, un ka bhi tah e dil se shukrguzaar hoon !! mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#36)
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21st August 2014, 09:37 AM
Quote:
dheroN daad, Hassanbhai Quote:
hamaari jaanib se dheroN daad aapko..... duaaoN ke saath, Adil ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#37)
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20th August 2014, 10:47 PM
dostoN ... is baar hum 1 naheen balki 2 lafzon par ek saath ghaur karenge ye donon lafz saath mil kar ek jumle ki shakl ikhtiyaar kar lete hain, so hum us jumle par bhi ghaur karenge ye 2 lafz hain "nasheb" aur "faraaz" aur in se jumla banta hai "nasheb-o-faraaz". chaliye, is mushkil se dikhne waale jumle ko deconstruct karte hain ... ye asal mein bilkul hi aasaan sa hai nasheb = descent / lows / downward slope / utaar / neeche jaana o = and / aur faraaz = ascent / highs / upward slope / chardhaav / oopar aana hence, "nasheb-o-faraaz" simply means "descent and ascent", "lows and highs", "utaar aur chardhaav" hum "nasheb-o-faraaz" ke equivalent jumlon ko hindi aur english mein aam bolchaal mein istemaal karte rehte hain, jaise "lows and highs" ya "utaar-chardhaav". ye jumla kis khoobsurti se kisi bhi safar ya raah ki daastaan keh jaata hai. ye jumla aksar metaphorically use hota hai, zindagi ke safar ya zindagi ki raah ke liye .... ya zindagi se jurhe pehluon ke safar/raah ke liye .... jaise ki mohabbat ka, junoon ka, hayaat ka, rishton ka, hasraton ka, armaanon ka wagairah wagairah wagairah .... kisi bhi safar ke nasheb-o-faraaz hi use kathin bhi banaate hain magar dilchasp bhi ... maayoos bhi karte hain magar umeed bhi jagaate hain ... nasheb-o-faraaz se kuchh log dar bhi jaate hain par kuchh usey chunauti ki tarah lete hain ... nasheb-o-faraaz thakan bhi paida karte hain magar hausla bhi mazboot karte hain ... kuchh logon ko nasheb-o-faraaz ki fikr sataati hai aur kuchh log us se beparwaah rehte hain ... par jo kuchh bhi ho ...nasheb-o-faraaz se guzar ke hi insaan ko zindagi aur us ke pehluon ki asli pehchaan ho paati hai, asli samajh aa paati hai. is baar hum "nasheb-o-faraaz" par shayari karenge aur saath saath shayari par guftagoo bhi karenge har baar ki tarah. aap apne qalaam mein "nasheb" aur "faraaz" ka alag alag istemaal bhi kar sakte hain, bas donon lafz qalaam mein shaamil hone chaahiye. aap in lafz ke natural variations jaise "nasheboN","faraazoN" ka bhi istemaal kar sakte haiN. aur ya phir in 2 lafzon ko "nasheb-o-faraaz" ke jumle ki shakl mein istemaal kar sakte hain. hence, you can say shayari with the phrase "nasheb-o-faraaz" in it, or the words "nasheb" and "faraaz" can come separately as well (along with its natural variations) but both the words should be present in your shayari. in case of any doubts or clarification or counter point, request you to please express the same. jo dost in 2 lafzon / jumle par aur roshni daal sakte hain, ya is ke kuchh aur pehloo saamne laa sakte hain, un se guzaarish hai ki wo aisa kar ke seekhne ka aur bhi zyada mauka dein hum sab ko. ab dekhte hain ki kaise kuchh maane huwe shora ne apne aashaar mein in ka istemaal kiya hai ... "NASHEB-O-FARAAZ" EK JUMLE KI TARAH ik tum ke tum ko fikr-e-nasheb-o-faraaz hai ik hum ke chal parhe to baharhaal chal parhe - Kaifi Azmi jo rah-e-ishq meiN qadam rakkheiN wo nasheb-o-faraaz kya jaaneiN - Daagh Dehlevi rah-e-junooN ke nasheb-o-faraaz meiN "mohsin" khirad ka phool bhi saNg-e-giraaN se kam to n tha - Mohsin Naqvi uljhe to sab nasheb-o-faraaz-e-hayaat meiN hum the ki un ki zulfoN ke kham dekhte rahe - Naushad Ali kya nasheb-o-faraaz thi "tanveer" zindagi aap ne guzaar hi di - Habeeb Tanveer raah-e-ulat n jis ne tay ki ho wo nasheb-o-faraaz kya jaane - Jaleel Manikpuri ise vaasta kya kam-o-besh se nasheb-o-faraaz-o-pas-o-pesh se - Iqbaal ki nazm "saaqi-naamah" se ranjish-o-iltifaat-o-naaz-o-niyaaz hum ne dekhe bahaut nasheb-o-faraaz - Hali "NASHEB" AUR "FARAAZ" ... 2 ALAG LAFZ KE TAUR PE nasheb-e-hasti se afsos hum ubhar n sake faraaz-e-daar se paighaam aaye haiN kya kya - Kaifi Aazmi nasheb-e-dar ki mahek raaste sajaane lagi faraaz-e-baam ke mahtaab dil meiN dhalne lage - Nasir Kazmi Khuda kare ki mile tujh ko manzil-e-maqsood faraaz pa ke nasheboN pe bhi nazar rakhna - Rasikh Irfani is jumle / 2 lafzon par ghaur karne ka silsila hum agle 6 din tak jaari rakkhenge ... yani 26 August raat 9:00 PM India time ya 3:30 PM GMT to chaliye, ab hum "nasheb-o-faraaz" ke nasheb-o-faraaz se guzar jaate hain ek doosre ka haath thaam kar duaon ke saath zarraa mera maqaam sada manziloN se door raha |
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(#38)
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21st August 2014, 10:36 AM
shab ke hone tak yahaaN aaftaab nasheb meN Garq huva
maah na niklaa, tum na aaye, ye samaa taarik* rahaa (*dark) ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#39)
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21st August 2014, 01:38 PM
Quote:
daad dene ka ye andaaz bhii pasand aayaa.. Thanks dear vaise bilkul fursat meN hooN  iis liye yahiN dataa hooN   ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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(#40)
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21st August 2014, 11:05 AM
nasheb-e-chashm-e-tamaashaa* mujhe banaaye kyuN?
faraaz-e-daar-o-rasan* kii havas jagaaye kyuN? * look at spectacle with slanted eyes ** eminence of crucifixion ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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