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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye -
19th January 2008, 05:33 PM
aadaa'b ar^z hai dosto.N. Insa'allah sab se pehle Naya saal aap sab ki zii.Ndagii me.n khoob ,kaamyaabii, aur khushiiyaa.N laaye yeh merii dil se du_aa hai "AAMIN".Ab apni ek ghazal par aap sab dosto.N ki is'sallah chahta hoon,vaise mai.N ne is baar bhii poori koshish kii hai ki ek behtar aur poorjosh kalam likh sakoon. Is ghazal ke qaafee sher ek duje se juDe hue hai jo aap padhenge toh aap ko pata chal jaayega. Ummid karta hoon ki har baar ki tarah is baar bhee aap ki ummido.N par khara utar sakoo.n. Vaise aap sab dosto.n ke duaa-o- karam aur housala-afsaayii ki badaulat hee likh paata hoon jis ke liye tah-e-dil se aap sab dosto ka mamnoon hoo.n. Sabhi dosto se iltiija hai ki apne beshqeematii tabsare se is ghazal ko nawaaze.
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
aap ki raay ka mutzir
regards
mau
Last edited by acharya_mj; 19th January 2008 at 05:36 PM..
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DIL KI BAAT DIL TAK
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Location: MORADABAD (U.P.)
Rep Power: 37
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19th January 2008, 08:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by acharya_mj
aadaa'b ar^z hai dosto.N. Insa'allah sab se pehle Naya saal aap sab ki zii.Ndagii me.n khoob ,kaamyaabii, aur khushiiyaa.N laaye yeh merii dil se du_aa hai "AAMIN".Ab apni ek ghazal par aap sab dosto.N ki is'sallah chahta hoon,vaise mai.N ne is baar bhii poori koshish kii hai ki ek behtar aur poorjosh kalam likh sakoon. Is ghazal ke qaafee sher ek duje se juDe hue hai jo aap padhenge toh aap ko pata chal jaayega. Ummid karta hoon ki har baar ki tarah is baar bhee aap ki ummido.N par khara utar sakoo.n. Vaise aap sab dosto.n ke duaa-o- karam aur housala-afsaayii ki badaulat hee likh paata hoon jis ke liye tah-e-dil se aap sab dosto ka mamnoon hoo.n. Sabhi dosto se iltiija hai ki apne beshqeematii tabsare se is ghazal ko nawaaze.
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
aap ki raay ka mutzir
regards
mau
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Aadaab Manu ji kese hain aap ?
Janab aapke is kalaam ne to mehfil loot li aur kafi waqt laga hoga aapko is behtreen gazal ko likhne mein aapka likha hua mujhe hamesha hi pasand ata hai kunki aapke kalaam mein kafi haqiqat lagti hai aur puri shiddat ke saath likhtey ho aapke kalaam ki tareef to suraj ko diya dikhane jesa hai aur ham to mubarakbaad ke saath dili daad de rahey hain kubool farmaiye............Aapka Dost
"Do Pal Ruka Khushio.n ka Karwan"
Dunia ke sitam ki koi perwah nahi mujhko,
wo kyoun mujhpe ungliya uthaye ja rahe hain.
Jis shaks ko janta tha ek chehre se ''kashif''
Uske kitne chehre samne laye ja rahe hain.
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beautiful moment.........
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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19th January 2008, 09:12 PM
bahut khub MANU.................bilkul thik kaha KASHIF ne....tum bahut behtarin shayar ho...tumhari tarif ke liye to lafz bhi nahi mere pass.....u hi likhte rehna......
"LAMHA"
mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko’ii hamnaam teraa ,
ko’ii tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe....
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Shayri.com Moderator
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Location: INDIA
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21st January 2008, 10:56 AM
Manu BHaa'ii :
aadaab
Ghazal ko paRhate hi maalUm ho gaYaa kii aapne har Sher par baRii hi meHnat kii hay.. aSh'aar ko bayaaN karne kii aapki yeh umdaah koShiSh mujHe be-Had pasaNd aayii.. ees faa'eez Ghazal par DheroN saarii baDhaa'iiYaaN..! bas YuuNhi meHfil kii raunaq afzA'ii karte rahiYe..!
KhuSh raheN.. apnaa Khayaal raKheN
duaaoN ke saath ijaazat
aapka
~ Dhaval
*~*Dhaval*~*....Ek Ehsaas...
Last edited by Dhaval; 21st January 2008 at 11:02 AM..
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Registered User
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Posts: 1,089
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Toronto,Canada
Rep Power: 31
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22nd January 2008, 10:16 AM
hi manu,
aapki yeh ghazal ... kabiel a tareef hai .... bahut khoob .......
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
....ask^k keemtii hain to aapne khas ke liye hote hain...
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
.....wow .... really nice
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
....yehii to auro.n ke gunn hai ...
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
....beautifull
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
....
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
....may be dats love...
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
..... aye dost dil ke kareeb chahe dost ho yeh koi b yaadein to aate hi rahege..
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
....unke aane se bahar aagayii....lovely...keep it up!!!!!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
....
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
....nice one.......
aapki purii ki purii ghazal behtareen hai .... keep it up good work .... and i must say it was really hard work .... n hard work always pay back hai naaaaaaaa...... esi liye hume itnii khoobsuruat ghazal padhne ko mili ...
take care ...
see u with more good work
regards
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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hi -
24th January 2008, 08:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mohammad Kashif
Aadaab Manu ji kese hain aap ?
Janab aapke is kalaam ne to mehfil loot li aur kafi waqt laga hoga aapko is behtreen gazal ko likhne mein aapka likha hua mujhe hamesha hi pasand ata hai kunki aapke kalaam mein kafi haqiqat lagti hai aur puri shiddat ke saath likhtey ho aapke kalaam ki tareef to suraj ko diya dikhane jesa hai aur ham to mubarakbaad ke saath dili daad de rahey hain kubool farmaiye............Aapka Dost
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bahut bahut shukriyaa kashif jee,yeh to aap jaise dost ki dariyaadilli hai jo mujhe aap padhane chale aate hai,aap ne meri ghazal ko apna qeemati vaqt de kar padhaa is ke liye aap ka mamnoon hoon. jeen haa aap ki baat bilkul duroost hai ki is ghazal ko likhane men mujhe qafee vaqt lagaa. Vaise bhi mai likhata to hon magar jab tak tasalli nahee hotii khud ko tab tak post nahee karta,bas us ke upar sochata rehta hoon ki kaise ghazal ko aur achaa banaya jaya taaki aap sab dosto ke dil ko chho sake merii ghazal.
aap ka bahut bahut shukriyaaH
yunhee saath dete rahiyega
regards
manu
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Posts: 2,220
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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Thanx -
27th January 2008, 07:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LAMHA
bahut khub MANU.................bilkul thik kaha KASHIF ne....tum bahut behtarin shayar ho...tumhari tarif ke liye to lafz bhi nahi mere pass.....u hi likhte rehna......
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bahut bahut shukriyaaH Lamha mujhe padhane ke liye
yunhee aati rehna dost..........
regards
manu
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Mai shayar to nahi
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Location: mumbai,india
Rep Power: 21
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28th January 2008, 12:00 AM
bahut khoob manu jii..yeh kehne ki to zaroorat nahi ke yeh kitna behtareen ikha hai aapnee..bahut zabardast saare ashaar kamaal ke..
likhte rahen yunhin
yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??
--akelijaan--
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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30th January 2008, 11:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dhavalrami4you
Manu BHaa'ii :
aadaab
Ghazal ko paRhate hi maalUm ho gaYaa kii aapne har Sher par baRii hi meHnat kii hay.. aSh'aar ko bayaaN karne kii aapki yeh umdaah koShiSh mujHe be-Had pasaNd aayii.. ees faa'eez Ghazal par DheroN saarii baDhaa'iiYaaN..! bas YuuNhi meHfil kii raunaq afzA'ii karte rahiYe..!
KhuSh raheN.. apnaa Khayaal raKheN
duaaoN ke saath ijaazat
aapka
~ Dhaval
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shukriyaaH dhaval tumaara.
yunee aate raha karo dost
regards
manu
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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Thanx -
1st February 2008, 07:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by mann_chand
hi manu,
aapki yeh ghazal ... kabiel a tareef hai .... bahut khoob .......
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
....ask^k keemtii hain to aapne khas ke liye hote hain...
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
.....wow .... really nice
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
....yehii to auro.n ke gunn hai ...
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
....beautifull
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
....
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
....may be dats love...
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
..... aye dost dil ke kareeb chahe dost ho yeh koi b yaadein to aate hi rahege..
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
....unke aane se bahar aagayii....lovely...keep it up!!!!!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
....
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
....nice one.......
aapki purii ki purii ghazal behtareen hai .... keep it up good work .... and i must say it was really hard work .... n hard work always pay back hai naaaaaaaa...... esi liye hume itnii khoobsuruat ghazal padhne ko mili ...
take care ...
see u with more good work
regards
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shukriyaaH mandy tumaara
tum bhi kaafe achaa likhati ho
yunhee aati rehna dost
regards
manu
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~~Reshma ke Dil ki~~
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Location: Suriname
Rep Power: 18
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1st February 2008, 09:55 PM
Manu ji,kaise hai aap,
Aap ki ye gazal aap ke har gazal ki tarha laa jawaab hai,
bahot achha likha hai aap ne,bilkul mere dil ko chhu liye
Namaste
Reshma,
Dunya ke sitam ka koi hisaab nahi, Lekin meri houslo ka bhi jawaab nahi...
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Registered User
Offline
Posts: 3,851
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: karachi
Rep Power: 31
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3rd February 2008, 07:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by acharya_mj
aadaa'b ar^z hai dosto.N. Insa'allah sab se pehle Naya saal aap sab ki zii.Ndagii me.n khoob ,kaamyaabii, aur khushiiyaa.N laaye yeh merii dil se du_aa hai "AAMIN".Ab apni ek ghazal par aap sab dosto.N ki is'sallah chahta hoon,vaise mai.N ne is baar bhii poori koshish kii hai ki ek behtar aur poorjosh kalam likh sakoon. Is ghazal ke qaafee sher ek duje se juDe hue hai jo aap padhenge toh aap ko pata chal jaayega. Ummid karta hoon ki har baar ki tarah is baar bhee aap ki ummido.N par khara utar sakoo.n. Vaise aap sab dosto.n ke duaa-o- karam aur housala-afsaayii ki badaulat hee likh paata hoon jis ke liye tah-e-dil se aap sab dosto ka mamnoon hoo.n. Sabhi dosto se iltiija hai ki apne beshqeematii tabsare se is ghazal ko nawaaze.
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
aap ki raay ka mutzir
regards
mau
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manu aapne bohat acha likha hai aur mehnat saaf zahir hai aapke her sher se ye ashaar mujhe bohattt pasand aye....
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
bohat khoob manu yunhi likhte rahiye humesha aur khush rahiye apna khayal rakhiyega
Waqt ke jisam ki kharash hoon main
apne ander se pash pash hoon main
zaaat hai aetbaar e zaaat nahin
ab to main khud bhi apne saath nahin
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a broken shadow...
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: london
Rep Power: 21
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4th February 2008, 05:54 AM
wah janab..wah...bahut hi umda likha hai. kabhi kabhi jab humein koi gazal pasand aati hai to..hum usme se apna favourite bata dete hain likhne wale ko...par janab...humein to har sher hi pasand aaya. kitni sachai se likhi hai yeh ghazal.....aur lafzon ka istemaal to aapne bahut hi acha kiya hai.
one of the best pieces i have ever read. really really good jus beautiful. lafzon mein agar khoobsurti hoti....to is gazal ki khoobsurti hum bayaan kar dete. daad hajir hai janab...kabul kijiye.
take care
manish
Life is filled with goodbyes, a million goodbyes, and it hurts every time....and every time my heart dies a little...
Darkness falls on me like rain... just one drop at a time....
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Posts: 2,220
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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7th February 2008, 09:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by EkDharkan
Manu ji,kaise hai aap,
Aap ki ye gazal aap ke har gazal ki tarha laa jawaab hai,
bahot achha likha hai aap ne,bilkul mere dil ko chhu liye
Namaste
Reshma,
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hey Reshma thanx very much for ur reply,after a long time u came here and still remember me and read me, i m obliged. Really thanx for coming here reading and praising me.
keep coming
take care
regards
manu
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raj
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: dil mein khud ke..aisa nahi kisi ko mera pata nahi hai mujhe dhundhne ki had tak koi dhundhta nahi hai..un
Rep Power: 34
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7th February 2008, 10:15 PM
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
kya kiya jaye...riste purane aur ashk ka sath hamesha ka hai yahi to saare riste nibhate hai sath ho ya sath ke baad ho
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
yahi to duniya hai...yaisa hi sochte hai sab baat karna bhi gunaah hai
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
khud ko bina dekhe tohmate lagana logo ki fitrat hai manu ji
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
dusro ke jakhmo ko hawaa dena namak lagana sabki aadat hai aaj kal.
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
jaane ke bada hi ahmeeyat sabko pata lagti hai kisi ki yahi jamane ka dastoor bhi hai na
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
dard mein guajre lamho ko gazal mein samet laaye...
log bhi tabhi wah wah karne aaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
bahut sahi
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
unka muskurana aur hamara unjki khusi ke liye bar bar jakham kahna wah kya bata likhi hai
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
yadoin ko door karna namumkin hai dost
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
bahut shai unka aana mausam ka suhana hona hi to hai...par akhan aate hai woh
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
unke jane ke bad sab taraf gum ka basera ho gya hai na??
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
kya kahun ,....bahut gahrayee liye likhi hai kitne jakham aur dard hai ismein...inpe daad nahi de sakti sakhi ajnte hi hoge aap hai na...isliye bas khush rakho.
कुछ ऐसे पल जिनको संजोना है ,
शब्दों में पिरोना है , जिससे वो हमारी यादों में महकते रहे
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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14th February 2008, 03:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sakhi1909
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
kya kiya jaye...riste purane aur ashk ka sath hamesha ka hai yahi to saare riste nibhate hai sath ho ya sath ke baad ho
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
yahi to duniya hai...yaisa hi sochte hai sab baat karna bhi gunaah hai
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
khud ko bina dekhe tohmate lagana logo ki fitrat hai manu ji
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
dusro ke jakhmo ko hawaa dena namak lagana sabki aadat hai aaj kal.
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
jaane ke bada hi ahmeeyat sabko pata lagti hai kisi ki yahi jamane ka dastoor bhi hai na
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
dard mein guajre lamho ko gazal mein samet laaye...
log bhi tabhi wah wah karne aaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
bahut sahi
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
unka muskurana aur hamara unjki khusi ke liye bar bar jakham kahna wah kya bata likhi hai
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
yadoin ko door karna namumkin hai dost
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
bahut shai unka aana mausam ka suhana hona hi to hai...par akhan aate hai woh
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
unke jane ke bad sab taraf gum ka basera ho gya hai na??
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
kya kahun ,....bahut gahrayee liye likhi hai kitne jakham aur dard hai ismein...inpe daad nahi de sakti sakhi ajnte hi hoge aap hai na...isliye bas khush rakho.
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sakhi jee shukriyaah aap ka meri is ghazal ko itnee baariki se padh kar aur vistaar se reply karne ke liye, har sher yaha par khud men ek kahaani keh raha hai, yaha kaafe sher aap ko ek duje se juDe hue milenge,agar ek sher ko nikaal do to baaqee ke sher ki koii ahmiyaat anhee reh jaati hai. Maie yaha par total 12 sher likhe hai, har do sher ek duje se juDe hue,aap ne sabhi sher ko itni vistaar se reply kiyaa hai. achaa lagaa aap aye mujhe padha aur apna qeemati vaqt diyaa.
bahut bahut shukriyaa aap ka
yunhee aate rahiyega
regards
manu
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Moderator
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15th February 2008, 03:47 PM
manu jee.............kaya kahuN janab..........aapki gazal ka ek ek lafaz dil mein bas gaya....bahut bahut bahut behtreen likha hai aapne..........yoon hi mahfil mein char chaand lagatey rahiye....kush rahiye.
god bless u
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.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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16th February 2008, 01:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunita virender
manu jee.............kaya kahuN janab..........aapki gazal ka ek ek lafaz dil mein bas gaya....bahut bahut bahut behtreen likha hai aapne..........yoon hi mahfil mein char chaand lagatey rahiye....kush rahiye.
god bless u
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Sunita jee ne bilkul theek kaha hai appki ghazal ka aik aik lafz dil mai bas gya hai , youn hi likhty rahiyee ... is ghazal ki jitni taref ki jaey utna kam hai .
app ki ghazal itni achi hai k mujhy lagta hai shayad bilkul mery liye hi likhi gai hai or is ghala fehmi mai mujh se aik gunnah bhi howa hai mai ajj sab k saamny usy CONFESS ker rha hoon or Manu jee se bahut bahut sorry kerta hoon k please mujhy muaaf ker dijyee . Gunnah yeh howa mujh se k mai ne apny doston ko sunai yeh ghazal unhon ne mujh se poocha k kya yeh tum ne likhi hai us waqt sab bahut khush thy or me also was so thats why mai ne jhoot bol diya k mai ne likhi hai yeh Ghazal . Manu jee mujh se ghalti nhi gunnah howa hai or app k hisy ki dad mujhy mili i am sorry , mai app ka kasoor war hoon mujhy jo chaho saza day sakty hoo .
i am ashamed Sorry
But i swear mai ne kisi or ki ghazal k saath kabhi aisa nhi kya or na hi mai aisa kerna chahta hon , jo ghalti mujh se howi mai us per perda bhi daal sakta tha mager sach kehna hi mujhy theek laga
Mujeeb
Last edited by Mujeeb; 16th February 2008 at 01:17 PM..
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16th February 2008, 02:15 PM
**Jab bhi kisi sey kalam hota hai
Laboo per tera he naam hota hai
or jab bhi hota hai terey husan ka charcha
mufat m ^Monu^ badnaam hota hai**
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16th February 2008, 02:28 PM
sunita ji koi bat nahi, or dosto s kabhi sorry nahi boltey, m to bhoot khush hu m apke or aapkey dosto ke kuch kaam to aaya
**Aap ka noor hai jo par raha chehrey par
Barna kon puchta hai humey in andharoo may**
**yo he chaltey chaltey na janey kab jindgi ke hasi saam aa jay
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16th February 2008, 04:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by monu.sagar
sunita ji koi bat nahi, or dosto s kabhi sorry nahi boltey, m to bhoot khush hu m apke or aapkey dosto ke kuch kaam to aaya
**Aap ka noor hai jo par raha chehrey par
Barna kon puchta hai humey in andharoo may**
**yo he chaltey chaltey na janey kab jindgi ke hasi saam aa jay
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arre app to Sunita jee ko badnaam ker rahien hain Gunehgaar mai hoon
by the way app kaisy kaam aye ?
Mujeeb
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16th February 2008, 04:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eyesflicker
Sunita jee ne bilkul theek kaha hai appki ghazal ka aik aik lafz dil mai bas gya hai , youn hi likhty rahiyee ... is ghazal ki jitni taref ki jaey utna kam hai .
app ki ghazal itni achi hai k mujhy lagta hai shayad bilkul mery liye hi likhi gai hai or is ghala fehmi mai mujh se aik gunnah bhi howa hai mai ajj sab k saamny usy CONFESS ker rha hoon or Manu jee se bahut bahut sorry kerta hoon k please mujhy muaaf ker dijyee . Gunnah yeh howa mujh se k mai ne apny doston ko sunai yeh ghazal unhon ne mujh se poocha k kya yeh tum ne likhi hai us waqt sab bahut khush thy or me also was so thats why mai ne jhoot bol diya k mai ne likhi hai yeh Ghazal . Manu jee mujh se ghalti nhi gunnah howa hai or app k hisy ki dad mujhy mili i am sorry , mai app ka kasoor war hoon mujhy jo chaho saza day sakty hoo .
i am ashamed Sorry
But i swear mai ne kisi or ki ghazal k saath kabhi aisa nhi kya or na hi mai aisa kerna chahta hon , jo ghalti mujh se howi mai us per perda bhi daal sakta tha mager sach kehna hi mujhy theek laga
Mujeeb
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dear mujeeb.......aapko apni galati ka ahsaas hua...yehi bahut hai....galati karke agar hum us galati ko mahsoos kartey hain...aur us galati ko dubara na karne ka irada kartey hain to bahut acchi baat hai...mujhe umeed hi nahi pura yakeeN hai ki manu ji aapko maaf kar denge....es umr mein kai baar aise bachkana si galtiya.n ho jati haiN.....so in future take care
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.....Sunita Thakur.....
यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...
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Location: mumbai
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frnd 4ever -
16th February 2008, 06:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by acharya_mj
aadaa'b ar^z hai dosto.N. Insa'allah sab se pehle Naya saal aap sab ki zii.Ndagii me.n khoob ,kaamyaabii, aur khushiiyaa.N laaye yeh merii dil se du_aa hai "AAMIN".Ab apni ek ghazal par aap sab dosto.N ki is'sallah chahta hoon,vaise mai.N ne is baar bhii poori koshish kii hai ki ek behtar aur poorjosh kalam likh sakoon. Is ghazal ke qaafee sher ek duje se juDe hue hai jo aap padhenge toh aap ko pata chal jaayega. Ummid karta hoon ki har baar ki tarah is baar bhee aap ki ummido.N par khara utar sakoo.n. Vaise aap sab dosto.n ke duaa-o- karam aur housala-afsaayii ki badaulat hee likh paata hoon jis ke liye tah-e-dil se aap sab dosto ka mamnoon hoo.n. Sabhi dosto se iltiija hai ki apne beshqeematii tabsare se is ghazal ko nawaaze.
gHam mire phir zab^t mera aazmaane aa gaye
ash^k kuchh Rish^tey puraane phir nibhaane aa gaye
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
is qadar bhii log haiN bereh^m socha bhii na thaa
zul^m kar ke zakh^m par nishtar chalaane aa gaye
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
shaaKh-e-dil se phool ban kar dard kee phooTee Ghazal
phir lo ah-le-baz^m taariife.n lutaane aa gaye
jab kabhee Khoon-e-jigar se maiN ne likkhee hai Ghazal
hamnisheeN mere sabhee bas muskuraane aa gaYe
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
laakh chaaha hamne rukh yaado.N se teri moDna
beete kuchh bereh^m lamHe dil dukhaane aa haye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
Yu.n rahe apne maraasim haadso se umrabhar
Chaaha dil , khoon-e-jigar mera bahaane aa gaye
aap ki raay ka mutzir
regards
mau
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Aadab Acharaya ji,
kaise hai aap?
MASHA ALLAH,
bohot hi umda koshish pesh ki hai aapne,m
ek_ek ashaar kabile tarif,or dil ko chhu gaya.
sach aap logo ko padhkar ,hame b or achha likhne me madad milti hai,
aapko tahe dilse daad dena chahege,kabul kijiye
Apna khayal rakhiye
khush rahiye
ALLAH HAFIZ
Apki dost
Sweet HASSONI,
( Badrul HaSSaN ki SoNi )
()""""()()""""()
( ,'o' ) ( ,'o' )
(,) (,) (,) (,)
SoNY _ Badrul HASSAN
forever..
and ever and ever!
**********(¨`·.·´¨) Always *************
`·.¸(¨`·.·´¨) Keep
(¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´ Smiling!
`·.¸.·´
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
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Thanx dhaval -
19th February 2008, 11:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dhavalrami4you
Manu BHaa'ii :
aadaab
Ghazal ko paRhate hi maalUm ho gaYaa kii aapne har Sher par baRii hi meHnat kii hay.. aSh'aar ko bayaaN karne kii aapki yeh umdaah koShiSh mujHe be-Had pasaNd aayii.. ees faa'eez Ghazal par DheroN saarii baDhaa'iiYaaN..! bas YuuNhi meHfil kii raunaq afzA'ii karte rahiYe..!
KhuSh raheN.. apnaa Khayaal raKheN
duaaoN ke saath ijaazat
aapka
~ Dhaval
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haan dhaval tum bilkul hee sahii ho mai jab likhata hoon to likhane se pehle use kahi dafaa sochata hoo, aur har sher ko khoobsurat banane ki koshish krta hoon tum mujhe achhi tareeke se jaante ho kyunki tum bhi ek umda shaayar ho dost. tumaara tah-e-dil se shukragujaar hoon mujhe padhane ke liye aur pasand karne ke liye.
yunhee aate rehna
magar apni padhaayi men bhi dhyan lagana
regards
manu
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
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Hi -
8th March 2008, 03:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by akelijaan
bahut khoob manu jii..yeh kehne ki to zaroorat nahi ke yeh kitna behtareen ikha hai aapnee..bahut zabardast saare ashaar kamaal ke..
likhte rahen yunhin
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sara jee aap ka shukriyaaH
yunhee saath dete rahiyega
regards
manu
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
Rep Power: 33
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Thanx -
26th March 2008, 01:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by koi to ho
manu aapne bohat acha likha hai aur mehnat saaf zahir hai aapke her sher se ye ashaar mujhe bohattt pasand aye....
baat hamney kii jo rasman bhii haseeno se kabhii
log dekhiye toHmate.n ham par lagaane aa gaye
aaiine me.n apna chehra tum ne dekha hii nahii
Ungliyaa.n kyu.n apni auro.n par uthaane aa gaye?
zindagi bhar to nahii kii qad^r mere pyaar kii
mar gayaa to qabr par sham,e'N jalaane aa gaye
ilm ham ko jab huaa gham apna hai unki khushii
muskuraa kar ham tabhi phir Zakh^m khaane aa gaye
ham ne dekhee hee nahii aa.Ngan men aisee bhee fizaa
tum jo aaYe yooN lagaa mausam suhaane aa gaye!
haa.n magar apne muqaddar me.n yeh mausam hee na tha
tum gaye , din zar^d patjhaR ke puraane aa gaye
bohat khoob manu yunhi likhte rahiye humesha aur khush rahiye apna khayal rakhiyega
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bahut bahut shukriyaah Mani tumaara
tum bhi apna khayal rakhana
aur yunhii saath dete rehna
regards
manu
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Zakhm-e-Rooh
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Location: ahmedabad
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20th April 2008, 05:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by musafir ek pal
wah janab..wah...bahut hi umda likha hai. kabhi kabhi jab humein koi gazal pasand aati hai to..hum usme se apna favourite bata dete hain likhne wale ko...par janab...humein to har sher hi pasand aaya. kitni sachai se likhi hai yeh ghazal.....aur lafzon ka istemaal to aapne bahut hi acha kiya hai.
one of the best pieces i have ever read. really really good jus beautiful. lafzon mein agar khoobsurti hoti....to is gazal ki khoobsurti hum bayaan kar dete. daad hajir hai janab...kabul kijiye.
take care
manish
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thanx manish tum aaye to abhut achja laga yunhii aate rehna dost
manu
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