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khwabon men tasveer (ख्वाबों में तस्वीर) -
27th March 2014, 11:58 AM
Khwabon men tasveer banaataa hoon phir
husn tera us men dikhaataa hoon phir
rang badaa khub tera maah jabeen
us pe tera rang chadhaataa hoon phir
zulfen jo lehraaee tune gulbadan
lut ke khushboo wo lagaataa hoon phir
tan ye tera dekh ke marmar sa
uske liye **daar banaataa hoon phir
shauq, Safeer, bas ise zindaa karoon
khoon-e-jigar deke jagaataa hoon phir
ख्वाबों में तस्वीर बनाता हूं फिर
हुस्न तेरा उस में दिखाता हूं फिर
रंग बड़ा ख़ूब तेरा माह जबीन
उस पे तेरा रंग चढ़ाता हूं फिर
ज़ुल्फ़ें जो लहराई तूने गुलबदन
लूट के खुश्बू वो लगाता हूं फिर
तन ये तेरा देख़ के मरमर सा
उसके लिये **दार बनाता हूं फिर
शौक़, सफिर, बस इसे ज़िंदा करूं
खून-ए-जिगर देके जगाता हूं फिर
** दार = घर
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
Last edited by aadeil; 27th March 2014 at 12:37 PM..
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~$uper M0der@tor~
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27th March 2014, 01:42 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aadeil
[CENTER]Khwabon men tasveer banaataa hoon phir
husn tera us men dikhaataa hoon phir
rang badaa khub tera maah jabeen
us pe tera rang chadhaataa hoon phir
zulfen jo lehraaee tune gulbadan
lut ke khushboo wo lagaataa hoon phir
tan ye tera dekh ke marmar sa
uske liye **daar banaataa hoon phir
shauq, Safeer, bas ise zindaa karoon
khoon-e-jigar deke jagaataa hoon phir
** दार = घर
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waaahhhh kyaa khoob bayaani huii hai Aadeil saahab..... kyaa kahne, superbb and speechless..... ehsaason ke saath aapne badee eemaandaari nibhaayee hai .
alfaazon ka bahot khoob taanabaanaa hai aapki ye peshkash... ishkiyaa rangon me rangee khoobsurat tahreer.... ho zore kalam aur zyaadaa....
mukhlis.
Shaad....
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27th March 2014, 05:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sameer'shaad'
waaahhhh kyaa khoob bayaani huii hai Aadeil saahab..... kyaa kahne, superbb and speechless..... ehsaason ke saath aapne badee eemaandaari nibhaayee hai .
alfaazon ka bahot khoob taanabaanaa hai aapki ye peshkash... ishkiyaa rangon me rangee khoobsurat tahreer.... ho zore kalam aur zyaadaa....
mukhlis.
Shaad....
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khush' aamadid, Sameerbhai..........
bas, aapkee dua hamaare saath rahe............
dua ke saath Adil ka salaam............
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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29th March 2014, 05:13 PM
Bhai Aadeil sahab, achchi koshish ki hai aapne. Thoda sa aur maanjhne ki zarurat hai apne aap ko aur ghazal ki takneek ko. Aap bahut behtar kah sakte hain meri is salaah ke sath. Filhaal ek sher
rang badaa khub tera maah jabeen
us pe tera rang chadhaataa hoon phir
Yahaan gaur karne waali baat ye hai ke rang bada ya chhota nahi hota. To sher ki jo buniyaad aap khadi karne ki koshish kar rahe the wahi kachchi nikli is liye us khayaal ko poori tawajjo nahi mil payegi jitni ka sher haqdaar hai.
Koi ghalat baat lage to mazrat.
Khuda khair kare
Allaah haafiz
_____________________________________
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31st March 2014, 09:21 PM
waah waah aadeil ji bahot hi khub kalam pes kiya................touching...................... ......!!!
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1st April 2014, 10:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnjAAn!!!
Bhai Aadeil sahab, achchi koshish ki hai aapne. Thoda sa aur maanjhne ki zarurat hai apne aap ko aur ghazal ki takneek ko. Aap bahut behtar kah sakte hain meri is salaah ke sath. Filhaal ek sher
rang badaa khub tera maah jabeen
us pe tera rang chadhaataa hoon phir
Yahaan gaur karne waali baat ye hai ke rang bada ya chhota nahi hota. To sher ki jo buniyaad aap khadi karne ki koshish kar rahe the wahi kachchi nikli is liye us khayaal ko poori tawajjo nahi mil payegi jitni ka sher haqdaar hai.
Koi ghalat baat lage to mazrat.
Khuda khair kare
Allaah haafiz
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Sumit saab,
pehle to main aapka shukr guzar hoon ki aapne hamaaree ees rachna pe gaur kiya.....
aap ko yahaaN paa kar hum aapke mamnoon rahe hai.....
aapkee baat pe hum zaroor guar karenge....
sirf ek clarity, yahaaN rang ka badaa ya chhotahone kee baat nahiN kahi hai.......
balki, rang ka bahot khub hone ki baat kahee hai....... par shaayad aapka ye kehna hai ki kisee cheez ka khub hona apne aap men hi be-inteha hota hai? aur ees liye, badaa ya bahot kee koi gunjaaiish nahin hai?
main chahunga, aap ees pe thoda aur tabdeer farmaiye....
bakee ashaar pe bhee aapke bayaanaat kee ummeed rakhunga.... kyuN ki aapne kahaa hai, filhaal ye ek sher
duaoN ke saath....
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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1st April 2014, 10:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Masoom Pyar
waah waah aadeil ji bahot hi khub kalam pes kiya................touching...................... ......!!!
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aapka bahot bahot shukriya, Sudhirji.............
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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1st April 2014, 12:06 PM
Aadeil Sahib .
Aapki khayalon se saji tasveer bahut bhayi humein.
Apka bayan Rang Bara Khoob ....bilkul durust hai kyunki
mujhe parne pe mehsoos hua ki yahan rang ko saraha gaya
hai bara khoob keh kar jo ki theek hai .
God bless.
Sanjay Sehgal
khone Pane ki daur mein yun uljha hai har bashar ,
Isee kashmeqash mein kat raha Zindagee ka safar.
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1st April 2014, 12:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hamdam
Aadeil Sahib .
Aapki khayalon se saji tasveer bahut bhayi humein.
Apka bayan Rang Bara Khoob ....bilkul durust hai kyunki
mujhe parne pe mehsoos hua ki yahan rang ko saraha gaya
hai bara khoob keh kar jo ki theek hai .
God bless.
Sanjay Sehgal
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Sanjayji,
Aapka teh-e-dil se shukra guzar hooN.....
bas yun hi hausla afzaaee farmate rahiye.............
Aur agar kahiN aapko kuch bhee galat lage, beher ya bayaanaat jisse ki gazal ya sher galat ho raha hai toh be zeejak aap hameN bata sakte haiN....
SDC ke aap jaise shaayar hi hamare guru haiN, toh hum bilkul bura nahiN manenge
aapka bahot bahot shukriya.......
Adil ka namaskaar......
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
Last edited by aadeil; 1st April 2014 at 12:48 PM..
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1st April 2014, 12:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aadeil
Sumit saab,
pehle to main aapka shukr guzar hoon ki aapne hamaaree ees rachna pe gaur kiya.....
aap ko yahaaN paa kar hum aapke mamnoon rahe hai.....
aapkee baat pe hum zaroor guar karenge....
sirf ek clarity, yahaaN rang ka badaa ya chhotahone kee baat nahiN kahi hai.......
balki, rang ka bahot khub hone ki baat kahee hai....... par shaayad aapka ye kehna hai ki kisee cheez ka khub hona apne aap men hi be-inteha hota hai? aur ees liye, badaa ya bahot kee koi gunjaaiish nahin hai?
main chahunga, aap ees pe thoda aur tabdeer farmaiye....
bakee ashaar pe bhee aapke bayaanaat kee ummeed rakhunga.... kyuN ki aapne kahaa hai, filhaal ye ek sher
duaoN ke saath....
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Pahle to mazrat mere pichhle bayaan ke liye. Shayad us waqt main kisi uljhan meN theek se padh hi nahiN paya aur bade chhote jaisi ek betuki si raay qayam ki. Aap ka khayaal apni jagah durust hai. Aage bhi aise hi likhte rahiye
_____________________________________
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1st April 2014, 12:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnjAAn!!!
Pahle to mazrat mere pichhle bayaan ke liye. Shayad us waqt main kisi uljhan meN theek se padh hi nahiN paya aur bade chhote jaisi ek betuki si raay qayam ki. Aap ka khayaal apni jagah durust hai. Aage bhi aise hi likhte rahiye
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Sumitji,
hamne bilkul bura nahiN mana hai
hum samajh sakte haiN ki humen bahot si uljhaneN aur zimmedaariyaN hoteee hai. bas aap yun waqt nikaal kar yahaaN aate raheN
aapka bahot bahot shukriya............
salaam............
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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Main shayar to nahin.....
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24th April 2014, 10:10 AM
aadil jee.......na jaane kaise is kalaam se door reh gaya.......aaj pada to bahut afsos hua......kamaal je ehsaas hain aapke....daad kubul karein.
एक हाथ में दिल उनके एक हाथ में खंजर था
चेहरे पे दोस्त का मुखौटा अजीब सा मंजर था
Arvind Saxena
Ph. No. 7905856220
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25th April 2014, 01:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by aru
aadil jee.......na jaane kaise is kalaam se door reh gaya.......aaj pada to bahut afsos hua......kamaal je ehsaas hain aapke....daad kubul karein.
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Arvindji,
aapka hamaare qalaam se rubaroo hona aur aapki hausla afzaaee ke liye mamnoon hooN......
bas, aapki duaoN ka arzmand hooN..........
Namaskaar.............
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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1st May 2014, 11:37 AM
nice shaayri i think you have love some one..
www.onlinepokies.me
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5th May 2014, 12:09 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by manuellancaster
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who is not in love, dear? ha ha haa
frankly, it was just some thought which came to mind and I put it down here....
Thanks for the compliments...........
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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11th May 2014, 02:22 PM
Waah waah waah Aadeil ji !!! Is ghazal ki shokhi aur deewanagee dekhte hi banti hai !!! Dher saaree daad aap ko !!!
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12th May 2014, 11:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by zarraa
Waah waah waah Aadeil ji !!! Is ghazal ki shokhi aur deewanagee dekhte hi banti hai !!! Dher saaree daad aap ko !!!
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zaraaji,
aapka bahot hi mamnoon hooN. aate rahiye............
ख़ुदा परेशां तेरी बला से तेरे सितम से तेरे अधम से
अगर हसीँ होते ज़ुल्म तेरे तू भी तो कुछ शर्मसार होता
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