Sdc ghazal 1- draft

[zidd]

dosto , aapke sher kuch is tarah se corrections kiye hai maine.
ye final graft nahi hai.
aap sabko ijazat hai ki aap ko agar kuch pasand nahi aaye to self correct kar den.
kuch sher beher se out the unhe shayar hi ke lafzo me beherband karne ki koshish ki hai...jisse thought na badle.
kuch grammatical errors hataii hai.
thats all.
any one can comment on any sher and provide his version for any sher.
if the writer consents to further correction done by any member , then that sher will be accepted.

Mere AaGhaaze muhabbat ki kahaanii hai ye,
kisii gulposh haseenaa ki nishaanii hai ye.....(Shaad)

roz karte hain muhabbat meiN jo marne ki baat
ye muhabbat hai puraanii ke jawaanii hai ye.... (zarraa)

hai chaman unse hi roshan ,hai ye mehfil bhii jawaaN,
hai karishma ya adaa unki suhaani hai ye........ (aadeil)

Ishq ki raah meiN wo tod ke taare laaye
Dil e khushfehm ko ummeed jataani hai yeH... (zainy)

Imtehaa, shokiyaa bhi lene lagi hain mere
Tishnagi qurbato se abto mitani hai ye.......(naaz)

Kabhi ye khilte nahi gul ki tarah din me par
Karay mad-hosh ye shab, raat kee raani hai ye!... (Ahmad hyderabadi)

Mai bhi ashiq ,nahi hone ka, bharam rakh lunga
Tum bhi kah dena ke afwaah puraani hai ye ....... (zidd

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