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Usse keh dena............... |
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(#1)
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beautiful moment.........
  
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Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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Usse keh dena............... -
2nd December 2009, 10:45 PM
kuch khaas nahi, bas ek chhoti si koshish hai... kuch ehsaas hai is dil ke....umeed hai is pariwaar ke sab dost apni raay se aagah zaroor karenge....
us se kehna ke sare mausam ab badal se gaye hai, nikal aayi hai dhoop ab barsaat ke baad usse keh dena. us se kehna ke chaha to tha usne muje barbaad karna, par uske har dard se hai mera dil aabaad usse keh dena. us se kehna ke shayad hi is dard ka koi marham mile, dua-o-zaher hue hai ab to be-asar usse keh dena. us se kehna ke wasl ki raaton ka chaand ab madham ho gaya, shab-e-hijra me chha hi gaya andhera usse keh dena. us se kehna ke manzil ki fikr naa thi jab wo humsafar tha, uske jane se hui mai to raastey ki khaak usse keh dena. us se kehna ke ab to khud apni talash me khoyi hai"Lamha", zabt ka ab aa hi gaya aakhir kinara usse keh dena...........  "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#2)
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Anshumali
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Posts: 7,420
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: DELHI (INDIA)
Rep Power: 87
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2nd December 2009, 11:14 PM
Lamha Ji....aapki tehreer ka khayal acha laga mujhe.....adaayegi main nayapan dikhai diya.....bayaani umda rahi....sabhi sher khubsurat aur taaje lage....ek behtareen peshkash rahi aapki.....
do sher dil ke jiyada kareeb rahe.... us se kehna ke shayad hi is dard ka koi marham mile, dua-o-zaher hue hai ab to be-asar usse keh dena. us se kehna ke wasl ki raaton ka chaand ab madham ho gaya, shab-e-hijra me chha hi gaya andhera usse keh dena. tahe dil se daad...hazir hai...kabul farmaaye.... aise hi umda likhte rahiye... apna khayal rakhiye.... duaaon ke saath...  YuuN Besabab Aansoo Aate NahiN Lag Zaroor Koii Baat Dil Ko Rahii Hai ... Fareb Kaa ChaDhtaa Bazaar Dekh Insaaf Se Bastii Khaalii Ho Rahii Hai ... ---Naresh Mehra---- |
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(#3)
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Banned
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Posts: 2,586
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New Delhi
Rep Power: 0
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3rd December 2009, 12:38 AM
us se kehna ke sare mausam ab badal se gaye hai,
nikal aayi hai dhoop ab barsaat ke baad usse keh dena. beautiful ........... it seems so romantic .... mujhe is tarah ki romantic poetry psand hai .... jisme dard ho .... zudia ka dard bhi aur paas ki mohabbat bhi ... dard isme tum -dono ka hai ... romance mosam ka ... thoda atpata lagega tumko lekin mujhe aisa hi lagta hai  jaati barsaat ke baad ki dhoop .... bahut meethi hoti hai ...aur aati barsaat ki teekhi us se kehna ke chaha to tha usne muje barbaad karna, par uske har dard se hai mera dil aabaad usse keh dena. ye wala acha ni laga .... koe kisi ko barbaad karna nahi chahta hai na lamha ...... haan ho jate hain hum lekin .. iski bajah hum khud hote hai koe aur nahi hota ...... mohabbat sirf abaad karti hai woh hum hote hia jo isme barbaad ho jate hai... apni marzi se apni zid se .. ya fir apne EGo se .... moahbbat ko hasil karna chahte hain... jabi mohabbat to humme khud hoti hia... baat abhut lambi hai so yahi rukta hun us se kehna ke shayad hi is dard ka koi marham mile, dua-o-zaher hue hai ab to be-asar usse keh dena. very sweet ..... dua aur zahar ... dono ko marham bana liya... ye wala to ishq ko byaan karta hai gud one us se kehna ke wasl ki raaton ka chaand ab madham ho gaya, shab-e-hijra me chha hi gaya andhera usse keh dena. lafzo ki tarteeb se dekha jaye to thoda sa gadbad hai wasl ki raat ... ka chand madham hua aur hizr ki shab mai andhera huaa.. doosri line mai bhi wasl ki raat ka zikr hona cahiye tha us se kehna ke manzil ki fikr naa thi jab wo humsafar tha, uske jane se hui mai to raastey ki khaak usse keh dena. nice one us se kehna ke ab to khud apni talash me khoyi hai"Lamha", zabt ka ab aa hi gaya aakhir kinara usse keh dena........... hmm ... par usse yeh sab kyu kahe .. hum .. usse kahenge zabt ka patthar hataa do woh jo hai na Lamha use sadi bana do shabe-hizr main bhujaun tum dono ki tum bas aake wasl ka chand khila do Keep smiling and writing toooo |
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well done...! |
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(#4)
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masttt...
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Posts: 2,151
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Chandigarh
Rep Power: 40
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well done...! -
3rd December 2009, 02:57 AM
Quote:
Aapki yeh koshish qabil-e-sataiysh hai, abhi aur achha likhna hai aapko...bahut bahut achha....iss koshish par daad haazir hai Kabuul kijiye.... Aise hi likhti rahiye...... Aapka dost, Vikram Uss Rizk Se Tau Maut Bhali Jis Rizk Se Aatee Ho Tere Parwaaz MeiN Kotaahi.... vikramjethi@gmail.com |
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(#5)
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An Incomplite Dream
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Posts: 3,017
Join Date: Mar 2009
Rep Power: 30
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3rd December 2009, 04:12 PM
Wahhhhhhhh Lamaha dear..........
Bhaut hi dlfareb ahsaas hai yeh........ Kya baat hai ussay keh dena..... What a amazing words, very nice........ Thoughts are to much good dil ki gehrai talak asar karte hai..... Keep wrtting ............. Khush rahiye apna khayal rakhiye Khuda Hafez....... 
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(#6)
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~$uper M0der@tor~
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Posts: 8,417
Join Date: Feb 2006
Rep Power: 61
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3rd December 2009, 04:31 PM
Quote:
behad haseen khayl hain lamha.. daad kubool karo. wese to poora kalaam hi mukammal hai par ye sher khaas pasand aaye.. us se kehna ke wasl ki raaton ka chaand ab madham ho gaya, shab-e-hijra me chha hi gaya andhera usse keh dena. us se kehna ke manzil ki fikr naa thi jab wo humsafar tha, uske jane se hui mai to raastey ki khaak usse keh dena. keep writing. shaad.. |
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(#7)
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Guest
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4th December 2009, 11:07 AM
Woww Lamha.. Its a gr8 poetry.. Waise to mai dard forum pe kam he aata hu.. Par aapki ye rachna shayri ki drishti se achhi lagi.. Aur jaanumaanu g ki har ek baat se mai b ittefaq rakhta hu.. Ya yu kahu k jo mai kehta is shayri ko padhkar, wo ungone keh diya...
Bahut khoob.. Par yaar tumko is dard ki forum pe dekhkar kuch ajeeb laga.. Is everything ok ? Matlab agar tumne sirf Likha hai to bahut he achha hai aur agar bhaawnaao ko lafzo ka roop diya hai to ...... |
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(#8)
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Huii Sabse Paraayi
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Posts: 5,283
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Kolkata
Rep Power: 44
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4th December 2009, 03:53 PM
Lamha sweety welcome back
yeh tum bich bich mein Eid ka chaand kyun ban jati ho... dear tumhare bina mahfil soona soona lagta hai .... tumhari tahreer mujhe behat pasand aayi saare aashar achhe haiN yeh sher dil ki kareeb raha us se kehna ke sare mausam ab badal se gaye hai, nikal aayi hai dhoop ab barsaat ke baad usse keh dena. apna khayal rakhna DuaoN ke saath Diya  Mohabbat ke baad mohabbat mumkin hai faraz. Magar toot ke chahna sirf ek baar hota hai Goodbye SDC Diya |
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(#9)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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4th December 2009, 07:19 PM
Quote:
Naresh ji, tahe dil se aapki shukra guzaar hu ke aapne yaha ka rukh kiya aur meri is koshish ko saraha... aap jaise doston ka yuhi saath raha to likhne ki gustakhi karti rahungi...thanx a lot.. khush rahiye..apna khayaal rakhiye... LAMHA.......... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#10)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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4th December 2009, 07:24 PM
Quote:
Vikas, mai aapki har ek baat se puri tarah sehmat hu...aapne hamesha hi muje ek honest opinion diya hai..aapki har daad aur har ek baat mere sar-aankho par..mai puri koshish karungi ke aur bhi achcha likhu... aap yuhi apni kimati raay de kar raasta dikhate rahiyega....apna saath banaye rakhiyega...it means a lot to me...khush rahiye... aapki dost, LAMHA..... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#11)
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Registered User
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Posts: 474
Join Date: Apr 2009
Rep Power: 24
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5th December 2009, 12:02 PM
Quote:
aapka andaz-e-baya bahut accha h... |
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(#12)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:32 PM
Quote:
Vikram, ji haa janab.... abhi to shuruwaat hai...agar aap jaise doston ka saath raha to Inshaallah aage bhi koshish barkaraar rahegi...aapki daad sar-aankho par... yuhi apna saath banaye rakhiyega.... khush rahiye.... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#13)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:34 PM
Quote:
Sameer, izzat-afzai ke liye aapka bahut bahut shukriya ... i m glad u liked it.... yuhi apna saath banaye rakhiye..... khush rahiye..... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#14)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:38 PM
Quote:
Shaad, aapki daad mere sar-aankho par.... muje behad khushi hai ke aapko meri ye adnaa si koshish pasand aayi.... yuhi apna saath banaye rakhiyega.... khush rahiye.... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#15)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:41 PM
Quote:
Raj, ur comments means a lot to me..... tumne itni izzat-afzai ki uske liye tahe dil se shukra-guzaar hu.... yuhi apna saath banaye rakhna dost... khush raho..... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#16)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:45 PM
Quote:
Diya, tumne itni izzat bakshi uske liye shukriya dear....meri is koshish ko pasand karne ka tahe dil se shukriya....yuhi apna saath banaye rakhna......khush raho..... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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(#17)
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beautiful moment.........
Offline
Posts: 6,429
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: u.s.a
Rep Power: 42
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29th December 2009, 07:47 PM
Quote:
Shipra, shukriya aapko meri ye koshish pasand aayi.... umeed hai aap yuhi hume padhti rahegi..... khush rahiye.... "LAMHA"mujhko acchaa nahiiN lagtaa ko段i hamnaam teraa , ko段i tujhsaa ho to phir naam bhii tujhsaa rakhe.... |
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