Lijiye Hum haazir haiN
Lekin hum koi expert to hai nahi isliye aapko takneeki baatein jaane ke liye kisi expert ka sahara lena hoga(maikashji and Ferozji can help u out) bas itna zaroor kahungi ke khayalaat bahut acche haiN..maine aapki dono ghazlein paRhi and aap accha khaasa likh lete ho ..lekin ek cheez maine notice ki ke aapki dono ghazloN mein 'MATLAA'(First sher having same words(Radeef) in both lines) missing hai....aur aapki ghazlein Beher mein nahi hain jo meri ghazloN ki bhi khamiyaN hain...I'm trying to understand Beher though..dekho kab palle parta hai
aur u can also put ur name or Takhallus in the 'maqtaa' ie; last sher.
Waise ye sher bahut khoob likha hai...
hum ne to likh di un par ghazal puri
kissi ne nahin pocha hum kis ke deewane the
Wah!!!Chalein hume bata dein aap kiske deewane the...
Keep trying!!
All the best...!!
shumaila