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meri sadaa
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akelijaan
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meri sadaa - 27th August 2006, 09:13 PM

hi frnds,
aaj kuch aisa likha hai jo ke shayad aap mai se kayi ko pasand na aaye.matlab ke kaafi alfaaz jo maine istemaal kiye woh bahut strong hai,negatively.yeh to mujhe bhi mehsoos hua.par mai inka koi aur subsitute nahi dhoond paayi.
paish-e-khidmat hai,


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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Re: meri sadaa
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Amanush...
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Re: meri sadaa - 27th August 2006, 09:57 PM

Originally posted by akelijaan

teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.


Akelijaan Ji...!

Hum ko aap ka yaha kalaam bahout acha laga...! Tadap aur
vedna se bharpur hai...! Sach kahoun to, it's partly related to me...!

Keep it up...ok ?



Jeene ke liye mujhe ek sapna dedo
Haqeekat meri jaaN liye jaa rahi hai

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Re: meri sadaa
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dilip200
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Re: meri sadaa - 28th August 2006, 11:22 AM

akelijan ji
aapki ye gazal padi kafi dard se bharpoor hai........
apne dil ki tadap ko badi bekhubi se shawdo me piroya hai aapne jahan aapke ye sher aapke man ki peeda ko batate hai...

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

wahi aapka ye sher to kamal ho gaya......

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye. [/B][/QUOTE]

aapne apne mehbook ki barbadi ke sath apne mouth bhi mang li............... wah...
behad acche khyalat hain aapke ...

keep wrinting..... take care

aapka dost
dilip


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Dard bantne se ab darr lagta hai
mere gamo ka usnane falsafa bana diya
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akelijaan
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28th August 2006, 11:13 PM

danny ji,

bahut khushi hui mujhe aapko apni post par dekh.hausla afzaai ke liye tahe dil se shukrguzaar hun.umeed hai aapka saath yunhin barqaraar rahega.

aate rahiyega.
thnx,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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29th August 2006, 07:00 PM

shukriya dilip ji,aapne mujhe padhne ke liye waqt nikala,dil se shukrguzaar hun.umeed hai aage bhi aapka saath rahega.
bye tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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Re: meri sadaa
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chaahat
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Re: meri sadaa - 29th August 2006, 07:19 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by akelijaan
hi frnds,
aaj kuch aisa likha hai jo ke shayad aap mai se kayi ko pasand na aaye.matlab ke kaafi alfaaz jo maine istemaal kiye woh bahut strong hai,negatively.yeh to mujhe bhi mehsoos hua.par mai inka koi aur subsitute nahi dhoond paayi.
paish-e-khidmat hai,


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.
Main ise negative nahi kahungi.. yeh to gusssa hai jo us shaks ke bewafa hone pe zaahir ho raha hai..

bewafai ki chot dard, aur kabhi kabhi apne pyar ki tyag... yeh sab samajhti hun main..

aap apna khayal rakhein... khush rahein..

~Priya



"Dikha kar khawaab in aankhon ko, De gaye aansoon in mein Tum..
Kaise chalka doo yeh aansoon, In mein bhi To rehTe ho Tum.."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Sirf Tanu Ki ChaahaT...... ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

   
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sukanya
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29th August 2006, 07:50 PM

Namaskar Akelijaan ji

Bahut khoobsurat ghazal likhi hay aapney....har sher kabile-tareef hay....acha lagta hay aapka likha padhna...yuun hi likhti rahiye...

take care
   
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akelijaan
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31st August 2006, 12:07 AM

priya ji,
aapko meri post par dekh bahut khushi hui mujhe.aur us se zayAda khushi is baat ki ke aapne mere ehsaas,jazbaat ko samjha.thnx.umeed hai aapka saath yunhin barqaraar rahega.
aate rahiyega.
bye,
tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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31st August 2006, 11:51 AM

sukanya ji,
aapko mera likha pasand aaya jaankar bahut khushi hui.aap jaison ko apni post par dekh bahut khushi hoti hai mujhe.umeed hai aapka saath yunhin barqaraar rahega.
aati rahiyega.
bye,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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hi
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rajveeer
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hi - 31st August 2006, 12:08 PM

teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.

jaan ji app tak raj ka salaam pounche.....appne bhut umda tareeke se apne alfazon ko sharon main byaan kiya hai.....bhut acha lagga p[arh kar......yu hee likhti rehna hamari duuaiyan appke saath hai.......raj........


un se kar liya kinara unki khushi ki khatir
ab mujhe bewafa kahiye ya bawafa kahiye...(Raj)
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Re: meri sadaa
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sunita thakur
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Re: meri sadaa - 31st August 2006, 12:20 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by akelijaan
hi frnds,
aaj kuch aisa likha hai jo ke shayad aap mai se kayi ko pasand na aaye.matlab ke kaafi alfaaz jo maine istemaal kiye woh bahut strong hai,negatively.yeh to mujhe bhi mehsoos hua.par mai inka koi aur subsitute nahi dhoond paayi.
paish-e-khidmat hai,


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.
aree wah dost, kaya khoob likha hai appne, appne dil ke jazbaat bahut acchi tarah pesh kiye hai. har ek ashiaar dil ko chu gaya. waffa mai dua to sab kartey hai, par yeh bad-dua bhi bahut pasand aaye. bahut umda likha hai appney, yu hi likhti rahna.

appki dost


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


.....Sunita Thakur.....

यह कह कर मेरा दुश्मन मुझे हँसते हुए छोड़ गया
....के तेरे अपने ही बहुत हैं तुझे रुलाने के लिए...


   
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Dhaval
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31st August 2006, 12:29 PM

bahot hi achhi tarike se aapnepesh kiya hai aur har lafz bahothi achhelage mujhe

aap unhi istarha likhti raho bas yehi ummid karta hu


aapka dost dhaval


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Re: meri sadaa
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KunaaL
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Re: meri sadaa - 31st August 2006, 02:55 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by akelijaan


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.
Akeli ...



uff sabse pehle ek baat kehna chahuNga mohatarma .. mujhse bhi kisi ne bohat arsa pehle kaha tha .. bada azeeb sa lagta hai bina naam ke kisi ko pukarna ... aur aapke id se aapko pukarne par mujhe kitna dard mehsoos hua keh nahi sakta .. ho sake to apna naam likh dijiyega... maiN janta huN bahane bohat se hoNge .. par likh deN to bhadiya rahe...

Aur jo pehla sher maine quote kiya usme ruswa-o-badnaam... aapko nahi lagta ruswai .. aur badnami dono shabdoN ka meaning ek hi hai .. waise meri urdu acchi nahi .. but mujhe aisa laga... baaki kalaam pe nazar daale to accha hai bohat .. aapke khayaloN maiN teekhe pan ka hona laazmi hai .. kyuNki jab dil toot-ta hai to dard ke sath gusse ko bhi lata hai .. koun kahega ise ki use pasand nahi aaye .. mujhe accha laga aapka kalaam.. takneeki barikiyoN pe aur dhayan de to bohat accha likh payengii .. aapki likhawat main wo hunar hai .. alfazoN ka intekhaab acche se kiya hai aapne...

accha hi hai sab .. mujhe accha laga .. apna khayal rakh ke likhte rahiye ... aur maiN kuch galat likh gaya huN to muafi ka talabgaar huN ...

aapka apna

kunal


KunaaL (Sifar).........

Hai 'sifar' bhi reyazi ka hissa..
Shayrii bhi hisaab ki hogi..
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31st August 2006, 03:54 PM

mohtarma jee !

maiN aapke naam se to wakif nahi huN aur shayad zindgi meiN pehli martaba aapko padh bhi raha huN !

bahut khoob likha hai

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

ye ashaar behad dilchasp laga !

magar

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.

idhar aap zindgi se kuch naakhush nazar aayiN hai !

dua karta huN ki aapki zindgi se naraazgi jald hi khatam ho aur aap iska lutf uthaayeiN !

tareef Qabool ki jaye !


andaaz
   
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akelijaan
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1st September 2006, 05:07 PM

raj ji,
apne keemti waqt mai se meri liye waqt nikaalne ka bahut bahut shukriya.aapko meri post par dekh bahut khushi hoti hai mujhe
yunhin saath dete rahiyega.
bye,tc


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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1st September 2006, 05:12 PM

very well said sabhi misre tareef kabil hain,ummeed hai aage bhi aise umda khayalat padhne milenge...likhti rahen
shaad
   
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1st September 2006, 11:59 PM

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam ho jaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar kar jaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.


Hii dear,

Kya khoob likha hai tumne, dard bhi aur naarazgi bhi… ab kya kahu inn khyaalon ka?... Bas itna kahungi ki kuch tumhari aur se parh ke achha laga. Hope everything is fine with you… keep writing and take care of yourself.
   
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Re: meri sadaa
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Re: meri sadaa - 2nd September 2006, 07:43 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by akelijaan
hi frnds,
aaj kuch aisa likha hai jo ke shayad aap mai se kayi ko pasand na aaye.matlab ke kaafi alfaaz jo maine istemaal kiye woh bahut strong hai,negatively.yeh to mujhe bhi mehsoos hua.par mai inka koi aur subsitute nahi dhoond paayi.
paish-e-khidmat hai,


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.

bahut khoob akeli jaan ji
apne jazbo ka aap ne jo labzo ka gahna pahnaaya hai vo
kaabil-e-taariff hai,aap ke is kalaam ma dard,dagaa,aur rushwaayi ka behatareen mel hai,mazaa aa gaya padh kar

aise hi likhte rahiye
aap ka dost manu
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akelijaan
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3rd September 2006, 02:18 PM

sunita ji,
aapko meri post par dekh bahut khushi hui,mera likha pasand karne ka bahut bahut shukriya.
umeed hai aapka saath yunhin sada barqaraar rahega.aate rahiyega.
bye tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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akelijaan
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3rd September 2006, 02:19 PM

thnx dhaval ji,jo aap meri post par aaye.hausla afzaai ka bahut bahut shukriya.yunhin saath dete rahiyega.
bye tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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akelijaan
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3rd September 2006, 02:23 PM

hello kunal ji,
bahut khushi hui aapko meri post par dekh.mera likha pasand karne ke liye tahe dil se shukrguzaar hun.aur meri galti point out karne ka bhi bahut bahut shukriya.ainda se is baat ka zaroor dhayyan rakhungi.gar galtiyon ko pata nahi chalega to sudhaar bhi nahi aayega,rite?
umeed hai aage bhi isi tarah aap saath dete rahenge.aate rahiyega.
bye,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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4th September 2006, 10:02 PM

kshitiz ji,
meri post par aapko dekh bahut khushi hui.mera likha pasand kane ke liye bahut bahut shukriya.isi tarah saath dete rahiyega.
bye,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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4th September 2006, 10:06 PM

shaad ji,
bahut acha laga aapko yahan dekh.umeed hai aage bhi hausla afzaai ke liye aap aate rahenge.
bye,tc


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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bohat khoob - 5th September 2006, 09:26 PM

app itnaa aachaa likhtii hainn bohatt khoobhh kyaa mainn aapkaa naamm jaann saktaa huunn


ajay bhambra
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5th September 2006, 09:26 PM

parul ji,apne keemtio waqt mai se mere liye waqt nikaalne ka bahut bahut shukriya,acha laga aap ko yahan dekh.isi tarah meri himmat baandhne aate rahiyega.
bye,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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5th September 2006, 09:27 PM

manu ji,
bahut khushi hui ke aap jaise kalakaar ko is nacheez ka likha pasand aaya,acha laga.umeed hai yeh saath aage bhi miltaa rahega.
bye,tc.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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7th September 2006, 04:55 PM

ajay sahab,
bahut acha laga aapko yahan dekh.aate rahiyega.


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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12th November 2007, 11:27 PM

AKELI JI
Aapke dard ko hum mahsus kar sakte hai hume to isko padkar hi ahsas huaa ki dard kya hai aap per to guzri hai to aapke dard ka ahsas kya hoga shabdo me baya kya jana SHAYAD MUMKIN HI hai.
mana ki aapko jisne ye dard dya kabhi aapki wo chahat rahi hogi jab wo aapki chahat rahi to phir usko bad-duaa kyo, sochiye kya wo shaks bhi chaino sakun se hoga.. kabhi nahi aapki bad duaa aapki narazgi uska chain aur bada degi.. mera ye manna hai ki dard dene wale ko duaa di jaye…
aapka likha har lafz lajavab hai dil ki gahraiyo se nikla hai lagta hai aapne bahut chaha hai jiske lye ye likha hai..kuch galt likha ho to mafi ka talbgar hai ye GD


Sans leta hoon main to Zakhmo ko hawa lagti hai,
Tu hi bata A Zindagi, Tu meri kya lagti hai
GD
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26th November 2007, 02:16 PM

"mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,"

wah SARA ji,, kya dard hai aapki rachna mai,, sach much dil ko chhoo gayi,,,,

bas aise hi apne dard ko bayan karti rahiye,, achha laga aapko pad kar,,

thanxx 4 sharing,,,,


"Laut kar khud to kabhi aata nahi,is duniya mai koi..
par yaad bahut aata hai,, chhodkar jaane wala.."

"< - J - I - T - >"
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3rd April 2008, 11:38 PM

Tahnkoo Gd Ji Aur Jit..thankoo So Much For Appreciating My Work..
Saath Dete Rahiyega


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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yoyosimran
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3rd April 2008, 11:59 PM

hi
what have you written.........

u have written.... too good...

keep it up man....

its like wine...
u c...jithna poorana ho...uthna achha.....

love
simran


If you want ur dreams to cum true...
WAKE UP...!


Love,
SIMRAN
   
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sakhi1909
raj
sakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud ofsakhi1909 has much to be proud of
 
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4th April 2008, 03:35 AM

saar dear
yahan ek baar phir pada acha laga

sakhi


कुछ ऐसे पल जिनको संजोना है ,
शब्दों में पिरोना है , जिससे वो हमारी यादों में महकते रहे
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akelijaan
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7th October 2008, 10:53 PM

hehe thankyou simran..nice way of comparision..glad u liked it..keep comin


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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7th October 2008, 10:55 PM

sakhiiiii huugss dear..bahut acha laga tumhe phir se yahan paaker...yunhin saath deti rehna..khush raho


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

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akelijaan
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4th February 2009, 12:03 AM

hi jit..hru..kahan gayab ho..khushi hui tumhe yahan paaker..yunhin saath dete rehna


Quote:
Originally Posted by jit_indori View Post
"mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,"

wah SARA ji,, kya dard hai aapki rachna mai,, sach much dil ko chhoo gayi,,,,

bas aise hi apne dard ko bayan karti rahiye,, achha laga aapko pad kar,,

thanxx 4 sharing,,,,


yun bin bulaaye milne chala aata hai,
gham ko mujh se yeh unsiyat kaisi??

--akelijaan--
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vinaydahiya
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4th February 2009, 08:30 PM

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

bahut badiya jaan ji..aap to kah rahe hai pasand na aaye par main to kahunga koi napasand kar hi nahi sakta..maza aa gayaaur sach kaha jaye to aap jaise he saiyro ke wajah se ye .com ki jaan barkaraar hai...aise he likhte rahiye..
Quote:
Originally Posted by akelijaan View Post
hi frnds,
aaj kuch aisa likha hai jo ke shayad aap mai se kayi ko pasand na aaye.matlab ke kaafi alfaaz jo maine istemaal kiye woh bahut strong hai,negatively.yeh to mujhe bhi mehsoos hua.par mai inka koi aur subsitute nahi dhoond paayi.
paish-e-khidmat hai,


teri bewafaaii ke charche aam hojaaye,
tu dunya mai ruswaa-o-badnaam hojaaye,

tujhe bhula na saki yeh badnaseebi meri,
tu beqaraar rahe,daga dene ka yeh anjaam hojaaye,

mere ashkon ki bunyaad pe qaayam yeh khushiyan teri,
rabb kuch aisa kare ki yeh khushiyan tamaam hojaaye,

jee hi lungi mai kuch yaadon ke sahaare,
ab tu kare wafaa aur woh nakaam hojaaye,

zara dekhu meri sadaa kab asar karjaaye,
bas usi pal meri zindagi ki shaam hojaaye.



mera kya hai main to deewana hu
kya bataoo tumko baare mein apne
mein to khud se hi begaana hu

...................vinaydahiya
   
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Mahuaa
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6th February 2009, 07:13 PM

hey saara dear di...h r u..??whts up..??




..♥♥..Mera Tumhara..kya Rishta hai..kuch bhi Nahi..
Agar kabhi..Gujarta dekho..kya Tum Mujhe..bulaoge..
Shayad Nahi..
Agar jo phir Hum..kabhi na Mile to..
Kya Tum yaad aaogoge..Nahi..
Kiuki..Tum Mere..koi Nahi..
Main janti hun..Magar..
Ho jab Mere koi Nahi..kiu lagte ho Mujhko Paraye nahi..
..♥♥..

..nm..

...mahuaa...
   
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