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Chanchal man yeh mera
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niral
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Cool Chanchal man yeh mera - 26th August 2005, 10:54 PM
"Main janti hoon ki main koi badi kaviyitri nahi hoon,

Main mere terrace par bahoot dino baad bethi thi...

koi aur nahi, koi phone nahi, koi chinta nahi..

bas main aur sirf main..

chand lines jo maine scribble ki woh share karna chahoongi.. "




Meri Jathpath-si rozmarra ki zindagi main,
Maine kuch apl apne aap ke saath jo bitaye;

Mano aisa laga ki main khud se hi kitni anjaan hoon,
aur doosro ko samajne chal padi hoon.

Saare Khushiyaan ek taraf,
Aur jaise man ki shanti ek taraf.

Yeh man bhi kitna chanchal hota hai,
Kabhie anant khushi toh kabhie rota hai.

Is chote se man main bhare hai hazaaroon sawal,
Par aaye jo museebat, yeh man hi karen hai kamal.

Jo hota hai, so kyon hota hai?
Jo nahi hota, so kyon nahi hota?
Kya jo hota hai, vo nahi hona chahiye?
aur jo nahi hota hai, kya vo hona chahiye?

Mere hriday mai ki aate hai vichar,
par afsos, har vichaar ka nahi kar sakti main shabdoon main upchaar...



Best Wishes,

Niral




Your suggestions and comments are most welcome
Last edited by niral; 26th August 2005 at 10:58 PM..
   
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Re: Chanchal man yeh mera
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meena chheda
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Re: Chanchal man yeh mera - 26th August 2005, 11:24 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by niral
"Main janti hoon ki main koi badi kaviyitri nahi hoon,

Main mere terrace par bahoot dino baad bethi thi...

koi aur nahi, koi phone nahi, koi chinta nahi..

bas main aur sirf main..

chand lines jo maine scribble ki woh share karna chahoongi.. "




Meri Jathpath-si rozmarra ki zindagi main,
Maine kuch apl apne aap ke saath jo bitaye;

Mano aisa laga ki main khud se hi kitni anjaan hoon,
aur doosro ko samajne chal padi hoon.

Saare Khushiyaan ek taraf,
Aur jaise man ki shanti ek taraf.

Yeh man bhi kitna chanchal hota hai,
Kabhie anant khushi toh kabhie rota hai.

Is chote se man main bhare hai hazaaroon sawal,
Par aaye jo museebat, yeh man hi karen hai kamal.

Jo hota hai, so kyon hota hai?
Jo nahi hota, so kyon nahi hota?
Kya jo hota hai, vo nahi hona chahiye?
aur jo nahi hota hai, kya vo hona chahiye?

Mere hriday mai ki aate hai vichar,
par afsos, har vichaar ka nahi kar sakti main shabdoon main upchaar...



Best Wishes,

Niral




Your suggestions and comments are most welcome

my dear niral,

muje khushi hui aaj k tumne khud k sath kuch lamhe bitaye...
yah har insaan ko karna chahiye. hum aapas mai sab se milte hai par khud ko maina bhul sa jaate hai.
aaj khud se mili tum to khud ko nahi jaan paayi... har baar yunhi mila karogi to jaan jaaogi ... or oos lamhe par mahsoos karogi k tum kitni majboot ho...
khush raho

tumhari maa
   
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niral
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26th August 2005, 11:33 PM
Pyaari meena aunty,

Am so happy that u read my poem first..

Guruji pehle reply kare, isse khushi ki baat kya ho sakti hai ek shishya ke lia?

if i aint mistaken this is my first attempt to write a Hindi poem

and yeah

i'll surely spend more time with myself..

often the time v spend with ourself is confused with the time v r not with anyone...
i.e watching TV, comp, sleeping, etc

but v don really connect ourselves with our inner self...

thanks a lot

Aapki Shishya

Niral
   
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Pulkit_gupta
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27th August 2005, 12:52 PM
Meri Jathpath-si rozmarra ki zindagi main,
Maine kuch apl apne aap ke saath jo bitaye;

Mano aisa laga ki main khud se hi kitni anjaan hoon,
aur doosro ko samajne chal padi hoon.

True...khud o nahi pehchaante acche se... aur doosro ko jaane ki chaah rehti hai...!


Saare Khushiyaan ek taraf,
Aur jaise man ki shanti ek taraf.

Yeh man bhi kitna chanchal hota hai,
Kabhie anant khushi toh kabhie rota hai.

Very true....Loved it..!


Is chote se man main bhare hai hazaaroon sawal,
Par aaye jo museebat, yeh man hi karen hai kamal.

Jo hota hai, so kyon hota hai?
Jo nahi hota, so kyon nahi hota?
Kya jo hota hai, vo nahi hona chahiye?
aur jo nahi hota hai, kya vo hona chahiye?

Jaan paate yeh to kabhi pareshaan naa rehte...!


Mere hriday mai ki aate hai vichar,
par afsos, har vichaar ka nahi kar sakti main shabdoon main upchaar...

Hmmm... but u did express urslef.. u conveyed the message very nicely...!


Dear Niral...!

Loved reading this one 2.. pata hai asabse acchi baat kya hoti hai jab hum naya naya likhna shuru karte hain... We dont try to confine our pen... we dont try to bind in ne rules.. bass jo dil ne kaha woh likh diya...aur yahi essence hai tumhaari poetry ka bhi.....

I loved the simplicity of this writing.. bahut hi pyaar se apna message convey kiya hai... maintain it sis...aise hi likhti rehna...

Accept my praises... do keep writing.. and take Good care

Kab sochaa thha milegaa humsafar "Shweta" jaisaa
Lagta hai is baar "Pulkit", kismat teri bhi rang laayii hai
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garima
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27th August 2005, 05:22 PM
Dear Niral,

tum jeetani sweet ho utani hi sweet tumhaari feelings hai..

bahoot acchhe se tumne apani feelings wyakt ki hai.. so sweet

with lots of love
Garima Di

Anant se bhi aage... itni si khwahish hai :)
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niral
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27th August 2005, 11:53 PM
Dear Niral...!

Loved reading this one 2.. pata hai asabse acchi baat kya hoti hai jab hum naya naya likhna shuru karte hain... We dont try to confine our pen... we dont try to bind in ne rules.. bass jo dil ne kaha woh likh diya...aur yahi essence hai tumhaari poetry ka bhi.....

I loved the simplicity of this writing.. bahut hi pyaar se apna message convey kiya hai... maintain it sis...aise hi likhti rehna...

Accept my praises... do keep writing.. and take Good care [/QUOTE]

Dear Pullu Bhaiyya

Am really happy that u liked it...
aapne mere vichaaro ko samja iske lia shukriya
likhti rtehne ki koshish zaroor karoongi..

Best wishes,

Niral
   
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niral
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27th August 2005, 11:56 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by garima
Dear Niral,

tum jeetani sweet ho utani hi sweet tumhaari feelings hai..

bahoot acchhe se tumne apani feelings wyakt ki hai.. so sweet

with lots of love
Garima Di
Meri pyaari Garim Di,

firstly, thank u ki aapko meri feelings sweet lagi...

aur usse zyada thanks ki aap muje Sweet kehti hai

Bahoot time se yahoo par aapse achhi tarah se baat hi nahi kar paa rahi..

ya toh aap busy ho ya phir main..

hope jald hi hum fursaat se baat kar paye


Best Wishes,

Niral
   
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Thumbs up 28th August 2005, 01:56 PM
hi
very nice one niral

priya
   
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niral
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28th August 2005, 11:53 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by damle_priya
hi
very nice one niral

priya
Dear Priya,

Welcome to this beautiful site shayri.com

Thanks for liking the poem...



Take care,

Hope to read ur writings soon

Best Wishes,

Niral
   
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28th August 2005, 11:58 PM
Niral ji,

Bahut khoob likha hai aapne...
Kavyitri hone ki zaroorat nahi mann ke bhav ko prakat karne ke liye..

Apna khayal rakho aur yunhi terrace par jaati raha karo..
Humara bhi kuch bhala ho jaayega

Take Care
Rohin

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niral
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29th August 2005, 12:00 AM
Quote:
Originally posted by Rohin
Niral ji,

Bahut khoob likha hai aapne...
Kavyitri hone ki zaroorat nahi mann ke bhav ko prakat karne ke liye..

Apna khayal rakho aur yunhi terrace par jaati raha karo..
Humara bhi kuch bhala ho jaayega

Take Care
Rohin
Dear Rohin Ji,

Thank u for such a sweet reply.

it made me smile

zaroor jaoongi terrace par..

Thanks for replying

Best wishes,

Niral
   
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VijayKSuvarna
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29th August 2005, 05:37 PM
Hi Niral ji,

Dimond won't be able to know it's value.
It's others who find the value............

Aap bahut accha likthi hey...
Keep up the good work.

Vijay

----Vijay
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Tumse Hasna Seekha, na seekha rona!
Tumse Jeena Seekha, na seekha tum bin jeena!!
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niral
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29th August 2005, 08:00 PM
Quote:
Originally posted by VijayKSuvarna
Hi Niral ji,

Dimond won't be able to know it's value.
It's others who find the value............

Aap bahut accha likthi hey...
Keep up the good work.

Vijay
Dear Vijayji,

Aapne bilkul Sahi kaha " Dimond won't be able to know it's value.
It's others who find the value............

thank u so much for replying..

Best wishes,

Niral
   
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