~*GhAyAl MeHfIl---geet tumhare dard tumhara~*

Taish · 07:03 PM

Bazm ko is nacheez ka ek baar phir aadaab.janab ek baar phir ek kavita lekar pesh hua hoon main is bazm ke saamne.asal me kuch padha aur waisa hi kuch likhne ki kosish ki jo likh paya wahi aapke saamne pesh kar raha hoon.bas yahi umeed lekar ki aap sabhi ko ye pasand aayegi.to janab pesh hai ek aur ghayal kalaam..............................

Agar na milta saath tumhara ,main ye geet nahi gaa pata.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Pyar tumhara pane ko hi,
Shayad janm hua tha mera.
Pakar ke sanidhya tumhara,
Jeevan dhanya ho gaya mera.

Yadi mere mann ke marusthal me tum ganga ki bhanti na behte,
Sookh gayi hoti ab tak-------mere jeevan ki rasdhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Shradhamay wishwas suman hain,
Pooja ka samaan nahi hai.
Bhav samarpan kar pane ki,
Nistha ka bhi bhaan nahi hai.

Yadyapi aradhana ka apna--------mulya hua karta jeevan me.
Kintu tumhe main pooj raha hoon,nishdin,jab kar naam tumhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Tum baithe ho mann mandir me,
Iska mujhko gyan nahi tha.
Peera ka samrajya alaukik,
Hota hai anuman nahi tha.

Peera ka such madhur manohar-----kewal anubhuti jagi hai.
Mere bhagya-gagan ka tabse,punah chamakne laga sitara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumnhara.

Aaj bhale hisammukh mere,
Pag-pag par aayenbadhayen.
Tumse shkti chintan paa kar,
Jagne lagi nayi aashayen.

Ekakipan ke dukh ki bhi ab tak sahi wedna kitni,
Nayi prerna paa kar tumse,gata hoon main geet dobara.
Main to kewal gane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

aapka LUCKY

kuhulika

Quote:

Originally posted by ghayal_shayar
Bazm ko is nacheez ka ek baar phir aadaab.janab ek baar phir ek kavita lekar pesh hua hoon main is bazm ke saamne.asal me kuch padha aur waisa hi kuch likhne ki kosish ki jo likh paya wahi aapke saamne pesh kar raha hoon.bas yahi umeed lekar ki aap sabhi ko ye pasand aayegi.to janab pesh hai ek aur ghayal kalaam..............................

Agar na milta saath tumhara ,main ye geet nahi gaa pata.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Pyar tumhara pane ko hi,
Shayad janm hua tha mera.
Pakar ke sanidhya tumhara,
Jeevan dhanya ho gaya mera.

Yadi mere mann ke marusthal me tum ganga ki bhanti na behte,
Sookh gayi hoti ab tak-------mere jeevan ki rasdhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Shradhamay wishwas suman hain,
Pooja ka samaan nahi hai.
Bhav samarpan kar pane ki,
Nistha ka bhi bhaan nahi hai.

Yadyapi aradhana ka apna--------mulya hua karta jeevan me.
Kintu tumhe main pooj raha hoon,nishdin,jab kar naam tumhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Tum baithe ho mann mandir me,
Iska mujhko gyan nahi tha.
Peera ka samrajya alaukik,
Hota hai anuman nahi tha.

Peera ka such madhur manohar-----kewal anubhuti jagi hai.
Mere bhagya-gagan ka tabse,punah chamakne laga sitara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumnhara.

Aaj bhale hisammukh mere,
Pag-pag par aayenbadhayen.
Tumse shkti chintan paa kar,
Jagne lagi nayi aashayen.

Ekakipan ke dukh ki bhi ab tak sahi wedna kitni,
Nayi prerna paa kar tumse,gata hoon main geet dobara.
Main to kewal gane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

aapka LUCKY

Lucky,

mere paas to alfaaz hi nahi hai kucch kehne ko..

bas itna hi keh sakti hoon...

tum ho isay gaane waale, geet tumhara, andaaz tumhara...

yu hin likhte raho.. khush raho...

Taish · 13th December 2005, 08:27 PM

maafi ka talabdar hoon doston kuch corrections ki shakht jaroorat thi isme nahi to padhne me bahut dikkat aa rahi thi,so correction kiye de raha hoon,

Agar na milta saath tumhara ,main ye geet nahi gaa pata.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Pyar tumhara pane ko hi,
Shayad janm hua tha mera.
Pakar ke sanidhya tumhara,
Jeevan dhanya ho gaya mera.

Yadi mere mann ke marusthal me tum ganga ki bhanti na behte,
Sookh gayi hoti ab tak-------mere jeevan ki rasdhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Shradhamay wishwas suman hain,
Pooja ka samaan nahi hai.
Bhav samarpan kar pane ki,
Nistha ka bhi bhaan nahi hai.

Yadyapi aradhana ka apna--------mulya hua karta jeevan me.
Kintu tumhe main pooj raha hoon,nishdin,jap kar naam tumhara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

Tum baithe ho mann mandir me,
Iska mujhko gyan nahi tha.
Peera ka samrajya alaukik,
Hota hai anuman nahi tha.

Peera ka such madhur manohar-----kewal anubhuti jagi hai.
Mere bhagya-gagan ka tabse,punah chamakne laga sitara.
Main to kewal gaane wala,geet tumhare dard tumnhara.

Aaj bhale hi sammukh mere,
Pag-pag par aayen baadhayen.
Tumse shakti chintan paa kar,
Jagne lagi nayi aashayen.

Ekakipan ke dukh ki bhi ab tak sahi wedna kitni,
Nayi prerna paa kar tumse,gata hoon main geet dobara.
Main to kewal gane wala,geet tumhare dard tumhara.

aapka LUCKY

Taish

Quote:

Originally posted by kuhulika
Lucky,

mere paas to alfaaz hi nahi hai kucch kehne ko..

bas itna hi keh sakti hoon...

tum ho isay gaane waale, geet tumhara, andaaz tumhara...

yu hin likhte raho.. khush raho...

dd bas aapki tareef sar aankhon par mere.aapko pasand aaya jaan kar behad khushi hui.umeed hai ki aap bas yunhi hume padhte rahoge.

aapka LUCKY

farhana · 13th December 2005, 09:24 PM

mere pyaare lucky...
tumhari kavita mujhe bahaut pasand aayi hai...
badhiya likkha hai tumne sweets...
yuhin likhte rehna.

Taish · 14th December 2005, 03:58 PM

dd it was my pleasure that u liked this poem of mine.hope u will keep reading.

urs LUCKY

Star · 14th December 2005, 04:32 PM

Jinab Ghayal sahab
kaisey hain aap? aap ki to kya baat hai maza aagaya parh key
liked it very much
take care

mehul jain · 14th December 2005, 04:42 PM

enjoyed u r a miracle to the site

KunaaL · 14th December 2005, 05:28 PM

Lucky pryas accha tha ... par shuruwaat jitni sahi ki tumne .. ant karte karte ... bhav halke hote chale gaye .. ye mera manna hai ho sakta hai maiN galat houN ... umeed hai tum bura nahi manoge...

Kunal

manoj kureel

wah ...kya baat hai...!!!!
Ghayal bhai...sach kahun....bhasha par aapki itni achi pakad hai,,,mujhe maloom nahin tha....sach mein behad khubsurat geet kaha hai aapne,,,mera hamesha se yeh manna hai ki hindi mein ,,khaas kar shudh hindi mein kuch bhi likhna bahoot mushkil hai,.,,magar aapne jis saralta aur khoobi se hindi mein apne dil ke jazbaat kahein hai wo laajawab hai,.....meri daad kuboool kijiye
-MANOJ

Taish · 16th December 2005, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Star
Jinab Ghayal sahab
kaisey hain aap? aap ki to kya baat hai maza aagaya parh key
liked it very much
take care

star janab aapko humara kalaam pasand aaya jaan kar bahut khushi hui hume.aur hum bas zindagi ko masti ke saath jiye jaa rahe hain.bas aap hume yunhi padhte rahiyega.aahsha hai ki aapko nirash nahi karunge.

aapka LUCKY

Taish · 16th December 2005, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mehul jain
enjoyed u r a miracle to the site

hey bro u juz said a bit too much but loved to hear that u liked my work.juz keep reading.

urs LUCKY

Taish · 16th December 2005, 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sacccha_pyar
Lucky pryas accha tha ... par shuruwaat jitni sahi ki tumne .. ant karte karte ... bhav halke hote chale gaye .. ye mera manna hai ho sakta hai maiN galat houN ... umeed hai tum bura nahi manoge...

Kunal

thanks bro i loved to know ki at least u liked my try kyun!

.chalo kosish me kuch to naya tha na bhaiya bas chalega.haan mujhe khud bhi laga ki main wo flow barkarar nahi rakh paya.par haan ye umeed jaroor hai ki aap aisi hi mujhe sudharte rahoge to main jaroor behtar likhne lagunga.bas yunhi aate rahiye bhaiya.

aapka LUCKY

Taish

Quote:

Originally posted by manoj kureel
wah ...kya baat hai...!!!!
Ghayal bhai...sach kahun....bhasha par aapki itni achi pakad hai,,,mujhe maloom nahin tha....sach mein behad khubsurat geet kaha hai aapne,,,mera hamesha se yeh manna hai ki hindi mein ,,khaas kar shudh hindi mein kuch bhi likhna bahoot mushkil hai,.,,magar aapne jis saralta aur khoobi se hindi mein apne dil ke jazbaat kahein hai wo laajawab hai,.....meri daad kuboool kijiye
-MANOJ

are bhaiya bas thodi bahut hindi aati hai usi me likhne ka prayas kar leta hoon.aapko mera ye prayas pasand aaya ye jaan kar mujhe hardik khushi hui.umeed hai ki aage aane kalaamon me bhi main aapko nirash nahi karunga.bas yunhi padhte rahiye aap hume.

aapka LUCKY